I met my new friend Oriana through the most ordinary of circumstances, although our finding each other was evidently destiny.
Please enjoy our story of a chance meeting within 4 degrees of separation (which makes us much cooler and much closer than Kevin Bacon), followed by the impossible-ness of it all.
1st degree:
In December, I went to Bali. After having the time of my life, I decided to keep up with my new friends through Facebook, an online site that I had been avoiding for years. Within a couple of months, and by finding friends of friends of friends, I had doubled and tripled the amount of friends from my Bali group to include college, high school, Kiwi, and Waukee friends.
Not so long after opening my Facebook account, I was approached by a random Nihon-jin (Japanese person) who was evidently destined to find me: a Nagoyan-born citizen studying his doctorate at the University of Iowa. The chances of that? Slim and none. So, I invited the nice man, called Sato, to join my group of Facebook friends.
2nd degree:
After talking to Sato for a few months, I fell into my usual drone of talking about the lack of people around here to talk to, and he offered to introduce me to his friend Kirsty, a Brit, whom he also randomly met through Facebook. Kirsty and I had a coffee one day in a small shopping district called Osukanon, and spent the afternoon gabbing and chatting and having a right good time.
3rd degree:
Kirsty has a roommate called Will, another Brit, who is gay and terribly cool. Will is an English language teacher at a middle school in Nagoya, a job which is both underpaid and under appreciated.
4th degree:
Will's friend Oriana is another ELT in his company. The two of them are the only young people in their company's group of 30, so they hit it off immediately. They spend a lot of time together sipping coffee, drinking beer, and picking up men. Exactly what friends should do.
Oriana is a Kiwi. Her nana, Tereza, works at an elementary school in Ponsonby, Auckland. The name of the school? Richmond Road, which sits at 150 Ponsonby Road. A place where (and hopefully the name sounds familiar to many of you), for 10 months, yours truly walked to, and taught in, almost every single day.
------
While sitting out at a bar last weekend, completely oblivious what we were about to find out, Oriana and I had the following conversation (which is not word-for-word, but instead taken best from my memory after having had a few beers):
W: So, Kirsty tells me your a Kiwi?
O: Yeah! And she told me that you lived there for a year as well?
W: Yes. I loved it.
O: Where did you stay?
W: In Auckland. What part of New Zealand are you from?
O: Auckland as well, but from the east side, about 40 minutes out. I came into the
city each day for school, though.
W: Do you know the bar S.P.Q.R. in Ponsonby? It was one of my favorite places.
O: Oh. I don't know it. So, what were you doing in New Zealand?
W: Teaching. I left America to try my hand at teaching abroad, and it seemed like a
good place to start.
O: Where did you teach?
W: Ponsonby, in Auckland.
O: (slowly) Uhhh... which school?
W: It's called Richmond Road Primary, on Ponsonby Road.
O: (looking shocked) My nana works there! Wait... wait... no... you're not 'the'
Wendy, are you.
W: Um, I'm not sure.
O: My nana is Teresa, and she told me that you would be coming to Japan and that I
should look for you!
W: Your nana is Teresa? Mother? We called her Mother!
O: Yes, that's my nana! No way. No WAY! I can't believe it...
-----
Now, keep in mind, that 1.) That Oriana's nana Tereza had told her months earlier 'A girl from our school, Wendy, is moving to Japan. Well, maybe it's Korea, but it's either Japan or Korea. She's somewhere there, so look out for her.' and 2.) Japan is a country of more than 127 million people, very few of whom are foreigners, of whom even less live in Nagoya.
The chances? Slim and none. But, without sounding too cliche', it's a small, small world.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
Murphy's Law
Today, my day followed Murphy's Law...
It actually began last Friday night, after a night out with friends. I was sound asleep when I woke dead up to remember that I had accidentally scheduled a Japanese lesson with my NEW Japanese teacher on the same day and time that I had scheduled a make-up tutoring session on Monday (today). Since neither are part of my regularly scheduled weekly routine, I hadn't realized the prior arrangement when I scheduled the Japanese lesson earlier that day.
In a panic (and in the middle of the night) I realized that I would not be able to cancel on Japanese for two reasons: 1) Because it's Japan, and you just don't do that, and 2) I don't have the vocabulary for it. So, I decided to just cancel my tutoring session for this week. Except that I didn't actually e-mail my student's father until just this morning. He is very flexible, and didn't mind the cancellation. I told him that I would tell Mikaela to get on the bus instead of staying after school, and to expect her at the bus stop at the usual after-school time.
Arriving at school feeling like I had accomplished quite a few e-mails before even beginning my day, my principal dropped in to remind me of my 4pm meeting with him in the afternoon. Realizing that I had not only double-, but triple-booked myself for that afternoon, I bowed and apologized (and swore at myself) profusely, and caneclled yet another meeting, as I realized again, that I would not be able to cancel on (my apparently troubling) Japanese lesson (see above reasons).
Before school started, my Japanese teaching assistant, Mrs. Adachi, walked in to let me know that some tickets I had purchased for an out-of-town trip I am taking next week (and taking two more unpaid days for) were actually to the wrong station. The cancellation fee, plus handling fee are going to cost me about $40, not to mention that my ACTUAL destination costs twice as much to go to. I am supposed to leave on Sunday, and am still awaiting tickets to my desired destination.
Mid-morning, the HS Softball coach came to talk to me about this weekend's upcoming MS softball tournament in Osaka, which, I am of course responsible for taking 15 girls to. It had not been mentioned to me, in a previous meeting, that I would have to miss a day of school for this, which, of course, requires finding a sub, planning plans, and making advance preparations. All of this on three days notice. Which, coupled with my two days off next week (see 'out-of-town trip' above), means I now have three sub days in a row to plan for. What also wasn't mentioned? That the tournament in Osaka would not only take me out of school on Friday, but would eat my entire Saturday, leaving me NO time to be at school to plan the last two of these sub days.
Then, at the post office, I had to wait THIRTY minutes (thus wasting a good hour of my lunch time) to pay two bills. I suppose because they were not busy and I am American. It just doesn't work in my favor most of the time. They had to make 37 phone calls to verify my existence, and were reluctant to even let me go after it all. I just wanted to scream 'Just take my money, bitches!'. But of course, I haven't learned THOSE words in Japanese either.
Discipline problems during school, coupled with having one hour to find all of my softball girls to hand out permission slips (while tutoring a student at the same time) made my afternoon a busy one. By about 3:45, though, I was breathing a little easier, and packing up to be at my (troublesome) Japanese lesson at half-four.
I thought all might be well...
Then I looked down and noticed my little Mikaela's stuff still sitting at her table. Immediately, my life turned into a slow-motion movie. I looked up to see her playing outside with her friends, and slowly reached my hand up to slap my forehead (while at the same time silently yelling 'No..o..oo.oo'- seriously, like a slow motion movie).
I had COMPLETELY forgotten to tell her to get on the bus.
(post script - all was well that ended well. mikaela's dad was contacted, and a neighbor, still at school, offered to take her home. i reached my japanese lesson right on time, and am currently STILL apologizing to mikaela's dad for my blunder...)
It actually began last Friday night, after a night out with friends. I was sound asleep when I woke dead up to remember that I had accidentally scheduled a Japanese lesson with my NEW Japanese teacher on the same day and time that I had scheduled a make-up tutoring session on Monday (today). Since neither are part of my regularly scheduled weekly routine, I hadn't realized the prior arrangement when I scheduled the Japanese lesson earlier that day.
In a panic (and in the middle of the night) I realized that I would not be able to cancel on Japanese for two reasons: 1) Because it's Japan, and you just don't do that, and 2) I don't have the vocabulary for it. So, I decided to just cancel my tutoring session for this week. Except that I didn't actually e-mail my student's father until just this morning. He is very flexible, and didn't mind the cancellation. I told him that I would tell Mikaela to get on the bus instead of staying after school, and to expect her at the bus stop at the usual after-school time.
Arriving at school feeling like I had accomplished quite a few e-mails before even beginning my day, my principal dropped in to remind me of my 4pm meeting with him in the afternoon. Realizing that I had not only double-, but triple-booked myself for that afternoon, I bowed and apologized (and swore at myself) profusely, and caneclled yet another meeting, as I realized again, that I would not be able to cancel on (my apparently troubling) Japanese lesson (see above reasons).
Before school started, my Japanese teaching assistant, Mrs. Adachi, walked in to let me know that some tickets I had purchased for an out-of-town trip I am taking next week (and taking two more unpaid days for) were actually to the wrong station. The cancellation fee, plus handling fee are going to cost me about $40, not to mention that my ACTUAL destination costs twice as much to go to. I am supposed to leave on Sunday, and am still awaiting tickets to my desired destination.
Mid-morning, the HS Softball coach came to talk to me about this weekend's upcoming MS softball tournament in Osaka, which, I am of course responsible for taking 15 girls to. It had not been mentioned to me, in a previous meeting, that I would have to miss a day of school for this, which, of course, requires finding a sub, planning plans, and making advance preparations. All of this on three days notice. Which, coupled with my two days off next week (see 'out-of-town trip' above), means I now have three sub days in a row to plan for. What also wasn't mentioned? That the tournament in Osaka would not only take me out of school on Friday, but would eat my entire Saturday, leaving me NO time to be at school to plan the last two of these sub days.
Then, at the post office, I had to wait THIRTY minutes (thus wasting a good hour of my lunch time) to pay two bills. I suppose because they were not busy and I am American. It just doesn't work in my favor most of the time. They had to make 37 phone calls to verify my existence, and were reluctant to even let me go after it all. I just wanted to scream 'Just take my money, bitches!'. But of course, I haven't learned THOSE words in Japanese either.
Discipline problems during school, coupled with having one hour to find all of my softball girls to hand out permission slips (while tutoring a student at the same time) made my afternoon a busy one. By about 3:45, though, I was breathing a little easier, and packing up to be at my (troublesome) Japanese lesson at half-four.
I thought all might be well...
Then I looked down and noticed my little Mikaela's stuff still sitting at her table. Immediately, my life turned into a slow-motion movie. I looked up to see her playing outside with her friends, and slowly reached my hand up to slap my forehead (while at the same time silently yelling 'No..o..oo.oo'- seriously, like a slow motion movie).
I had COMPLETELY forgotten to tell her to get on the bus.
(post script - all was well that ended well. mikaela's dad was contacted, and a neighbor, still at school, offered to take her home. i reached my japanese lesson right on time, and am currently STILL apologizing to mikaela's dad for my blunder...)
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Huey Lewis and the News*
*where 'the News' = Wendy Foreman
Long awaited, the picture finally arrived. I wonder, though, does Huey choose to make his face look like this in all pictures? Like a joke or something?
Oh, and Gary - the head(s) behind him? Chicago...
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Worth posting...
Don't ask questions. Just watch it.
We Are The World
(Mad, mad, mad props to my friendy Jen for forwarding this to me...)
We Are The World
(Mad, mad, mad props to my friendy Jen for forwarding this to me...)
Look how cute my students are!
A week or so ago, the students of 2nd grade culminated a unit on Japan by trying their hands at various things about Japanese culture. My teaching assistant, Shuuko, took these pictures of the little kiddos (and one big kiddo) making origami, practicing calligraphy (with real calligraphy brushes and ink, and yes, I did draw that all by myself), and participating in a traditional tea ceremony (with super bowing and all).
So much fun. So much cuteness!
So much fun. So much cuteness!
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Kazuhide
Background information for this article:
In Japan, there is a monthly magazine, printed nationwide, called 'Japanzine'. Inside are trendy ads, local restaurants, music scenes, and fun articles, all geared towards foreigners.
By FAR, the best part of the magazine each month is the small Q&A section penned by a Japanese man named Kazuhide (Kah-zoo-high-dee). Now, how much of a farce it is, I'll never REALLY know, but the premise is for foreigners to write in with semi-dumb/offensive questions, to which Kazuhide, in an equally offensive and vulgar way, will politely answer, in really bad Japanese ('reary' bad).
The answers are usually mostly-offensive towards Americans, and are ALWAYS laugh-out-loud funny. If you take it with a grain of salt, that is.
Two questions/answers in last month's 'Ask Kazuhide' feature article got HUGE laughs in the staff room, and are worth copying down for your enjoyment (particularly funny - the second one). But, if you are going to read further, please be prepared to be offended, as we are, when reading it, each month (i.e. Becky, this is not for Lauren's eyes!). Just to be safe, though in four places, I have replaced, or added clarification/censorship, using the following marks: []...
----
'Ask Kazuhide' (Japanzine, April 2008)
Hello Kazu!
Why are some Japanese people reverse-racist to foreigners. I went to a public swimming pool with my Japanese friend, only to be denied entry because I am a foreigner, or I don't look Japanese.
- Beached Swimmer
Dear Swimnner,
Idiot! That is regular racism, not reverse. This low brain ability is dangerous for swimming so we protect you and protect Japan from HIV.
--
Yo Kazuhide,
I have a question? Why are Japanese guys so hung up (pun totally intended) by the size of their lower parts? I love Japanese guys. After a few beers and dodgy Japlish conversation at an izakaya, I am usually in the mood to feel the motion of their ocean, so to speak.
Which is when they ruin my mood (and their chances of getting laid) by telling me, quite empithatically, that they have really small things. What's the deal? Don't they realize that I'd much rather find out (and judge) for myself than have them tell me. You seem to be an expert on Gaijin [foreigners]-Nihonjin [Japanese] relations! Help a mystified girl out!
- Mystified
Dear Mystified,
Japan is indirect and porite country. Basicarry they say [insert most direct name for male anatomy] is small not to offend. Truth is they fear your large [insert equally offensive term for female anatomy].
---
Ask Kazuhide online forum
The Best of Kazuhide
In Japan, there is a monthly magazine, printed nationwide, called 'Japanzine'. Inside are trendy ads, local restaurants, music scenes, and fun articles, all geared towards foreigners.
By FAR, the best part of the magazine each month is the small Q&A section penned by a Japanese man named Kazuhide (Kah-zoo-high-dee). Now, how much of a farce it is, I'll never REALLY know, but the premise is for foreigners to write in with semi-dumb/offensive questions, to which Kazuhide, in an equally offensive and vulgar way, will politely answer, in really bad Japanese ('reary' bad).
The answers are usually mostly-offensive towards Americans, and are ALWAYS laugh-out-loud funny. If you take it with a grain of salt, that is.
Two questions/answers in last month's 'Ask Kazuhide' feature article got HUGE laughs in the staff room, and are worth copying down for your enjoyment (particularly funny - the second one). But, if you are going to read further, please be prepared to be offended, as we are, when reading it, each month (i.e. Becky, this is not for Lauren's eyes!). Just to be safe, though in four places, I have replaced, or added clarification/censorship, using the following marks: []...
----
'Ask Kazuhide' (Japanzine, April 2008)
Hello Kazu!
Why are some Japanese people reverse-racist to foreigners. I went to a public swimming pool with my Japanese friend, only to be denied entry because I am a foreigner, or I don't look Japanese.
- Beached Swimmer
Dear Swimnner,
Idiot! That is regular racism, not reverse. This low brain ability is dangerous for swimming so we protect you and protect Japan from HIV.
--
Yo Kazuhide,
I have a question? Why are Japanese guys so hung up (pun totally intended) by the size of their lower parts? I love Japanese guys. After a few beers and dodgy Japlish conversation at an izakaya, I am usually in the mood to feel the motion of their ocean, so to speak.
Which is when they ruin my mood (and their chances of getting laid) by telling me, quite empithatically, that they have really small things. What's the deal? Don't they realize that I'd much rather find out (and judge) for myself than have them tell me. You seem to be an expert on Gaijin [foreigners]-Nihonjin [Japanese] relations! Help a mystified girl out!
- Mystified
Dear Mystified,
Japan is indirect and porite country. Basicarry they say [insert most direct name for male anatomy] is small not to offend. Truth is they fear your large [insert equally offensive term for female anatomy].
---
Ask Kazuhide online forum
The Best of Kazuhide
Monday, May 05, 2008
Scare-eeyy
When you are teaching (or working at school on a quiet day off), it is seriously frightening to hear Japanese fighter planes go overhead. Now, I don't think they're slim, quick fighter jets, like you'd imagine in America. I think they must be enormous, for the noise they make is like an exploding tornado in the sky.
I fear for my immanent death each time one passes above
'Oh my God, they've found me, I'm a goner!' These thoughts continually fill my head, and I just know, one of these days, they're going to come after me for previous comments on this blog (which, no doubt with my luck, is probably run by the Japanese CIA).
This is probably, seriously, what it looks like, as it descends towards the horizon.
Or, at least, this is how I imagine it...
I fear for my immanent death each time one passes above
'Oh my God, they've found me, I'm a goner!' These thoughts continually fill my head, and I just know, one of these days, they're going to come after me for previous comments on this blog (which, no doubt with my luck, is probably run by the Japanese CIA).
This is probably, seriously, what it looks like, as it descends towards the horizon.
Or, at least, this is how I imagine it...
What A Weekend!
Whew.
My four-day, Golden Week holiday weekend could not have been more packed. Although the events were numerous, three highlights are worth noting.
1. My new friends: Patrick and Kirsty.
I met Kirsty randomly through a friend* on Facebook (* = a guy I've never even met). We decided to meet for a quick coffee at a local tourist hangout/shopping plaza. We ended up spending the whole day together shopping, eating pizza, and drinking beer and bubble tea with Patrick. Patrick is a new student teacher at our school.
The following night, our (me and Patrick's) brand-new bf invited us to her house for crepes. Yums.
Pretty much, all three of us get along famously.
----
2. My first traffic violation.
Today, a rainy Monday, I went through a (just-turned) red light, on account that stopping, at my speed, would have been more dangerous. Unfortunately, I went through the light right next to the (fifth ones I've ever seen in this country) cops. They pulled me over real fast like, and ticketed me. I tried to explain myself, but of course, it did me no good (I might as well have been speaking Martian). But, I pulled two over on them... For starters, I'm supposed to drive around with these little magnet dealies that show that I am a new driver, which I REFUSE to have on my car. So, had they turned over my license to see the classification, my fine would have been doubled (dummies!). Then, (after calling the one cop who speaks English), it was translated to me that if I get no more violations for the next three months, the points I lost today will be re-added to my license. Stupid Japanese didn't know that for two of those three months, I'll be out of the country.
Super.
-----
3. My latest grocery bill: 3,987 yen (about $40)
I bought:
2 small cans of corn
1 can of sweetened condensed milk
1 small box of quick oats
1 small bunch of fresh flowers
3 oranges
3 bananas
6 ounces of blueberries
1 package of english muffins
a 4-pack of canned tuna
2 tubs of margarine
2 packages of rice dessert
I kinda wish, when I lived in New Zealand, that someone would have said to me: 'You think living here is expensive? Try Japan.'
----
For the most part, I think three- and four-day weekends should be a part of the regular work week...
My four-day, Golden Week holiday weekend could not have been more packed. Although the events were numerous, three highlights are worth noting.
1. My new friends: Patrick and Kirsty.
I met Kirsty randomly through a friend* on Facebook (* = a guy I've never even met). We decided to meet for a quick coffee at a local tourist hangout/shopping plaza. We ended up spending the whole day together shopping, eating pizza, and drinking beer and bubble tea with Patrick. Patrick is a new student teacher at our school.
The following night, our (me and Patrick's) brand-new bf invited us to her house for crepes. Yums.
Pretty much, all three of us get along famously.
----
2. My first traffic violation.
Today, a rainy Monday, I went through a (just-turned) red light, on account that stopping, at my speed, would have been more dangerous. Unfortunately, I went through the light right next to the (fifth ones I've ever seen in this country) cops. They pulled me over real fast like, and ticketed me. I tried to explain myself, but of course, it did me no good (I might as well have been speaking Martian). But, I pulled two over on them... For starters, I'm supposed to drive around with these little magnet dealies that show that I am a new driver, which I REFUSE to have on my car. So, had they turned over my license to see the classification, my fine would have been doubled (dummies!). Then, (after calling the one cop who speaks English), it was translated to me that if I get no more violations for the next three months, the points I lost today will be re-added to my license. Stupid Japanese didn't know that for two of those three months, I'll be out of the country.
Super.
-----
3. My latest grocery bill: 3,987 yen (about $40)
I bought:
2 small cans of corn
1 can of sweetened condensed milk
1 small box of quick oats
1 small bunch of fresh flowers
3 oranges
3 bananas
6 ounces of blueberries
1 package of english muffins
a 4-pack of canned tuna
2 tubs of margarine
2 packages of rice dessert
I kinda wish, when I lived in New Zealand, that someone would have said to me: 'You think living here is expensive? Try Japan.'
----
For the most part, I think three- and four-day weekends should be a part of the regular work week...
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
YAKKYU!
Baseball!
Japanese Baseball!
Last night, I had my first experience! I saw my beloved Chunichi Dragons at last!
First, I arrived, and was presented with food choices such as squid, sake, and noodles. I chose a hot dog (obviously) and beer, on account that they didn't have nachos. Jerks.
When I accidentally dumped half of my fries on the ground, I picked them up and ate them with no hesitation, realizing that the floor of that stadium was actually probably cleaner than my dishes at home.
Then, I cheered when I was supposed to, and didn't cheer when I was not supposed to. It's like a rule.
Lastly, when it was over, I picked up my own trash (I know, right?),and threw it away.
Ah, baseball - what a universal language.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Breaking the rules
Today, I broke a cultural rule, offering to do something that is historically taboo in Japan, thus, possibly inviting scandal into my house and threatening my reputation as a respectable, hard-working teacher.
I offered to take in a student teacher.
About a month ago, when I found out student teachers were coming, and needed accommodation, I was first to put my hand up, with cries of, 'Do you guys know how freaking bored I am in my apartment?' Imagine my surprise, though, when I came back to Japan and found that my offer had not been taken, and I was destined to continue to live alone for, what seems like, the rest of my life.
Yesterday, though, the first student teacher arrived at school and was introduced to me. We discussed accommodation, as this student teacher mentioned that there was still need, since research done, previous to coming to Japan, had shown apartments to have a $2000 deposit as well as $500 a month for rent. Now, unlike student teachers, I get PAID to teach and couldn't afford this, so of course, seeing that the student teacher had come, praying to find accommodation after arrival, I offered my extra room. I mean, really, do you guys know how freaking bored I am in my apartment?
So, after a bit of debate with the headmaster, discussions with the principal about how this choice could effect me professionally (many members of our conservative community might look down on me for this decision), as well as a few playful snickers from people who have come to know me best, I rose above and continued to realize that I don't care what people think. I also realized how nothing would make me happier to break the social norm in this country because I could care less. I won, and now have a temporary roommate.
He moves in this afternoon. ;)
I offered to take in a student teacher.
About a month ago, when I found out student teachers were coming, and needed accommodation, I was first to put my hand up, with cries of, 'Do you guys know how freaking bored I am in my apartment?' Imagine my surprise, though, when I came back to Japan and found that my offer had not been taken, and I was destined to continue to live alone for, what seems like, the rest of my life.
Yesterday, though, the first student teacher arrived at school and was introduced to me. We discussed accommodation, as this student teacher mentioned that there was still need, since research done, previous to coming to Japan, had shown apartments to have a $2000 deposit as well as $500 a month for rent. Now, unlike student teachers, I get PAID to teach and couldn't afford this, so of course, seeing that the student teacher had come, praying to find accommodation after arrival, I offered my extra room. I mean, really, do you guys know how freaking bored I am in my apartment?
So, after a bit of debate with the headmaster, discussions with the principal about how this choice could effect me professionally (many members of our conservative community might look down on me for this decision), as well as a few playful snickers from people who have come to know me best, I rose above and continued to realize that I don't care what people think. I also realized how nothing would make me happier to break the social norm in this country because I could care less. I won, and now have a temporary roommate.
He moves in this afternoon. ;)
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Dinner Party
The one thing I can say about the Japanese is that they can be really nice people. Once the barriers come down.
I teach two adult classes, which I picked up in the hope of meeting friends, only to find out I was awarded, what are probably, the only two 50 and older English-learner classes in the city.
But, for all of their years of age, they can be pretty funny sometimes. Like tonight.
My last activity of the evening was called Dinner Party. For this activity, I gave pairs a worksheet with the names of 40 famous people. They had to work together to choose 10 to invite to a 'dinner party', but for each guest, they had to explain why they had chosen him/her to invite.
Surprisingly, nobody chose Jesus, Hitler, or Buddah, but they did choose the following, word for word, and had good reasons to suit (please keep in mind these are beginning English learners who had NO help from me):
John Lennon: I want to hear Hey Jude live.
Albert Einstein: I want to discuss relative theory.
Cleopatra: I want to measure her height.
John Lennon: We want him to tell us he really loves Ono Yoko.
Cinderella: We want to ask what she will be at the end of the story.
Galileo: He shows me the movement of stars.
Romeo and Juliet: We want them to meet at our party.
Harry Potter: We want him to prepare the party.
J. S. Bach: I want to see his wig.
Adam and Eve: We want to give them cloths.
Harry Potter: I want to meet him and his friends and by magic clean house and make dinner.
(and my personal favorite)
Madonna: We want her to sing like a virgin.
I teach two adult classes, which I picked up in the hope of meeting friends, only to find out I was awarded, what are probably, the only two 50 and older English-learner classes in the city.
But, for all of their years of age, they can be pretty funny sometimes. Like tonight.
My last activity of the evening was called Dinner Party. For this activity, I gave pairs a worksheet with the names of 40 famous people. They had to work together to choose 10 to invite to a 'dinner party', but for each guest, they had to explain why they had chosen him/her to invite.
Surprisingly, nobody chose Jesus, Hitler, or Buddah, but they did choose the following, word for word, and had good reasons to suit (please keep in mind these are beginning English learners who had NO help from me):
John Lennon: I want to hear Hey Jude live.
Albert Einstein: I want to discuss relative theory.
Cleopatra: I want to measure her height.
John Lennon: We want him to tell us he really loves Ono Yoko.
Cinderella: We want to ask what she will be at the end of the story.
Galileo: He shows me the movement of stars.
Romeo and Juliet: We want them to meet at our party.
Harry Potter: We want him to prepare the party.
J. S. Bach: I want to see his wig.
Adam and Eve: We want to give them cloths.
Harry Potter: I want to meet him and his friends and by magic clean house and make dinner.
(and my personal favorite)
Madonna: We want her to sing like a virgin.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Low, Low, Low
Three things you should know before reading this entry:
1. Japanese radio stations are odd. There is no rhyme or reason to what they play: old American, new American, Japanese pop, classical, long periods of talk, etc.
2. Japanese DJ's are notorious for talking way too much on the air, as well as interrupting songs, in the middle, to talk. So, you'll be jamming away to a great tune when all of the sudden, in the middle, the song will lower, and the dj will talk right over the top before shortly ending the song long before it should.
3. Never, ever, ever take a wrong turn in Japan.
-----
It's no secret that I don't love living here. I find it tolerable mostly, and semi-enjoyable at best. I work really hard to make sure I stay busy, and this story takes place as I was driving to job #3, teaching adult ESOL classes. As usual, I was replaying the day's conversations in my head, and singing along, this time, to Boys 2 Men. When the song was over, the Japanese DJ came on to talk for a long time. Often, when the DJs speak in Japanese, I listen really carefully to try to pick out as many words as possible. Tonight's topic was fairly easy, and although I don't know why, I did understand that she was talking about ice cream, and comparing flavors, varieties, and calories.
I swear, three people had just cut me off, and I was feeling particularly nasty, when out of nowhere, I hear the first four beats of Flo Rida's song, 'Low'.
IMMEDIATELY, the biggest, biggest smile burst onto my face, and I (of course) began bumping along. Memories of actually LOOKING at Apple Bottom Jeans in Florida, or dancing with Tiff and Nik came to my head. Man, you couldn't have found a happier gaijin in town!
Then, two minutes into the song, it all went wrong.
I guess it all started when I decided to pass my normal street so that I could finish listening to this rare listening gem on MY local station. This was mistake number one, because as I drove past my turn, the DJ, on cue, lowered the song and started talking.
Mistake number two was when I, in my disappointment, decided to take the next left to quickly turn around back to my street and my lessons and my adult students who were patiently waiting. Except that when I turned left, I accidentally turned into the hospital.
MIstake number three? Not being able to read the signs that probably said things like 'Hospital' or 'Patient entrance only' or 'If you come in here and can't read Japanese, you'll never get out!' Immediately, this turned into a panic for me, and by the time I mazed my way out to them man in the ticket booth, I just looked at him and shrugged my shoulders as if to say 'Just let me out of here before I swear at you in English and then kick your ass.' He obliged.
In the end, I barely made it in time, but arrived safely. And I can chalk one more adventure in Japan up to a favorite song that brought amazing memories of my friends rushing to my mind.
Now, what I haven't told you yet is probably the almost-funniest part... When the DJ cut the song off early, I quickly realized that playing the song had been a marketing device for selling low-fat ice cream, because she mumbled a bit in Japanese before claiming such and such ice cream was 'low, low, low.'
And that is only funny if you are one of my friends.
1. Japanese radio stations are odd. There is no rhyme or reason to what they play: old American, new American, Japanese pop, classical, long periods of talk, etc.
2. Japanese DJ's are notorious for talking way too much on the air, as well as interrupting songs, in the middle, to talk. So, you'll be jamming away to a great tune when all of the sudden, in the middle, the song will lower, and the dj will talk right over the top before shortly ending the song long before it should.
3. Never, ever, ever take a wrong turn in Japan.
-----
It's no secret that I don't love living here. I find it tolerable mostly, and semi-enjoyable at best. I work really hard to make sure I stay busy, and this story takes place as I was driving to job #3, teaching adult ESOL classes. As usual, I was replaying the day's conversations in my head, and singing along, this time, to Boys 2 Men. When the song was over, the Japanese DJ came on to talk for a long time. Often, when the DJs speak in Japanese, I listen really carefully to try to pick out as many words as possible. Tonight's topic was fairly easy, and although I don't know why, I did understand that she was talking about ice cream, and comparing flavors, varieties, and calories.
I swear, three people had just cut me off, and I was feeling particularly nasty, when out of nowhere, I hear the first four beats of Flo Rida's song, 'Low'.
IMMEDIATELY, the biggest, biggest smile burst onto my face, and I (of course) began bumping along. Memories of actually LOOKING at Apple Bottom Jeans in Florida, or dancing with Tiff and Nik came to my head. Man, you couldn't have found a happier gaijin in town!
Then, two minutes into the song, it all went wrong.
I guess it all started when I decided to pass my normal street so that I could finish listening to this rare listening gem on MY local station. This was mistake number one, because as I drove past my turn, the DJ, on cue, lowered the song and started talking.
Mistake number two was when I, in my disappointment, decided to take the next left to quickly turn around back to my street and my lessons and my adult students who were patiently waiting. Except that when I turned left, I accidentally turned into the hospital.
MIstake number three? Not being able to read the signs that probably said things like 'Hospital' or 'Patient entrance only' or 'If you come in here and can't read Japanese, you'll never get out!' Immediately, this turned into a panic for me, and by the time I mazed my way out to them man in the ticket booth, I just looked at him and shrugged my shoulders as if to say 'Just let me out of here before I swear at you in English and then kick your ass.' He obliged.
In the end, I barely made it in time, but arrived safely. And I can chalk one more adventure in Japan up to a favorite song that brought amazing memories of my friends rushing to my mind.
Now, what I haven't told you yet is probably the almost-funniest part... When the DJ cut the song off early, I quickly realized that playing the song had been a marketing device for selling low-fat ice cream, because she mumbled a bit in Japanese before claiming such and such ice cream was 'low, low, low.'
And that is only funny if you are one of my friends.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Real letters from real parents
It's time for another installment of 'e-mails I get from my classroom parents'. I tell you, these e-mails are one of the best parts of my job. They make me smile EVERY time. And it helps me to understand how ridiculous I must sound when I try to speak Japanese...
(names have been removed for privacy)
-------
Hello
How was your trip? X is waiting for you.
I have to say bad news. X had broken his knee at music last Thursday.
X can't walk expect with the crukch. Now it is important that X would not move his leg.
Could you put him in the tall chair. Can my husband bring him to classroom in the morning early?
Because X need someone help. And after school se will pick X up at classsroom.
Thanks , I will call office tomorrow morning.
X's mom
(I recieved this one while I was gone. As I haven't been to school yet, I am wondering how student X broke his knee at music...)
------
Dear Wendy ;
Thank you for your hard working for the classs...
I wanna inform you about our family's short trip...
From tomorrow and the day after tomorrow (Dec. 11th and 12th), our faimily will make a family trip to Hokuriku area of Japan.
So, Y can't attend to the class. By this trip, Y can understand a lot more about Japanes culture..
If you have any other question, please give me a email or tel any time....
and also, please infrom this to the office, so they can manage the bus rides......
Thank you again and have a wonderful winter.
from Y's father
--------
Hi, how are you? I heard you and the NIS from Z
everyday. I always thank you for caring Z at
school. I think that Z and her sisters are
getting better to accommodate themselves to new school
life. But English is always a problem.
I know it is hard time for you to teach Z who
doesn't understand English and for Z not to fully
understand what's going on in class.
Usually we take 2~3 hours a day to do class homeworks
and ESOL homeworks. But Z and I will try hard to
do as possible as we can.
I wonder if she could play with other classmates well
or not. She made many good friends in Korea, but she
has prolem to communicate in English with friends so
far. As a mother, my first primary concerns are
English and making friends at school for Z.
Please let me know if she has problems in school life.
Thank you for your help again.
------
(names have been removed for privacy)
-------
Hello
How was your trip? X is waiting for you.
I have to say bad news. X had broken his knee at music last Thursday.
X can't walk expect with the crukch. Now it is important that X would not move his leg.
Could you put him in the tall chair. Can my husband bring him to classroom in the morning early?
Because X need someone help. And after school se will pick X up at classsroom.
Thanks , I will call office tomorrow morning.
X's mom
(I recieved this one while I was gone. As I haven't been to school yet, I am wondering how student X broke his knee at music...)
------
Dear Wendy ;
Thank you for your hard working for the classs...
I wanna inform you about our family's short trip...
From tomorrow and the day after tomorrow (Dec. 11th and 12th), our faimily will make a family trip to Hokuriku area of Japan.
So, Y can't attend to the class. By this trip, Y can understand a lot more about Japanes culture..
If you have any other question, please give me a email or tel any time....
and also, please infrom this to the office, so they can manage the bus rides......
Thank you again and have a wonderful winter.
from Y's father
--------
Hi, how are you? I heard you and the NIS from Z
everyday. I always thank you for caring Z at
school. I think that Z and her sisters are
getting better to accommodate themselves to new school
life. But English is always a problem.
I know it is hard time for you to teach Z who
doesn't understand English and for Z not to fully
understand what's going on in class.
Usually we take 2~3 hours a day to do class homeworks
and ESOL homeworks. But Z and I will try hard to
do as possible as we can.
I wonder if she could play with other classmates well
or not. She made many good friends in Korea, but she
has prolem to communicate in English with friends so
far. As a mother, my first primary concerns are
English and making friends at school for Z.
Please let me know if she has problems in school life.
Thank you for your help again.
------
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Trip-ending thoughts
Having spent the last three weeks in America, and coming back to Japan, I feel that I could adequitely put together a few words to describe Japan, as well as some words that do not describe Japan.
Words to describe Japan:
efficient
courteous
scheduled
cold
humble
quiet
compliant
drab
small
identical
busy
Words not to describe Japan:
welcoming
friendly
kind
considerate
As I walked through the terminal, I felt like I was just back to regular life again. Imagine, thinking a life in Japan to be regular. I had a never-ending list of errands forming in my head, including getting groceries and paying the bills, I just do it all here, in my own, learning kind of way. At the same time, I was looking at advertisements that I couldn't read, hearing conversations that I can't understand, and it kind of feels like I've never been gone.
If I learned one thing about myself from my trip home and back, it is how much I have grown as an individual, and how proud I am for living in a foreign country, far different from my own, with huge language barriers, and thriving. I am bettering myself by learning a new language and a new culture, and am finding the patience to accept my own personal flaws, as well as reflect on my everyday accomplishments whenever possible.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all who spent time with me during the last few weeks. Coming home to America was a well-needed reality check to remind me that, 1. even though I live in the twilight zone, there is an escape, and 2. I am incredibly fortunate to have so many friends and family at home who love and think about me, which is enough to get me through the hard moments. This past three weeks has been so fun... meeting new friends (think Tiff, Carolina, Heidi), forging new relationships (people who will put you up when you miss a flight), seeing old students (thanks for the ice cream, Lauren), sharing familiar traditions with family (yahtzee or peppermint dessert, anyone?)and seeing old friends (there's no one in the world like my bestie).
At the airport today, I was glad to be back in a place where I can line up my luggage and handbag and walk away to buy a ticket, use the restroom, or withdraw cash from the atm without any worry of dishonesty or theft. I appreciate the simple and polite 'excuse me' and the apologetic nod of someone who was accidentally in my way. I know that when I do get groceries later and ride on the train, that both experiences will be quiet and peaceful. I am ready for 'me' time again. And I'm also ready to accept the fact that for at least a week, I will turn the windshield wipers on instead of the turn signal.
On the bus from the airport, I passed my first cherry blossom tree. Cherry blossom season, which Japan is iconic for, began during my absence. But, seeing, for the first time, the white buds playing the part of the backdrop for farmers who are tending the rice fields on this nice afternoon gives me hope of warm weather and spring, following a long, cold, drab winter.
Now, as I prepare to pull into my apartment and go back to my 'normal' life, I have to be very honest. I don't mind being here so much at all.
Konnichiwa, Nihon. Hello, Japan.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Flying
As I set off to board my tenth and final flight in the last three weeks, I want to share a few of my personal thoughts on flying.
- When I was younger, I used to want to live at the airport. The excitement of packing a bag and going somewhere else was always exciting. Since I have become more of a traveller, airports and planes make me want to vomit.
- I've decided that I can't decide which is worse: getting to the gate REALLY early and sitting there, or being in a rush to make your flights. The latter makes you sweat from the running, and you could say that for me. To get to flight number 9, I had 27 minutes to run three terminals (no moving walkways, thank you very much LAX) to the very last terminal in the place. To get to my last flight, I had 45 minutes to run down 6 moving walkways (thank you, SFO), take a shuttle, walk on the runway, take an elevator, and three flights of stairs. Needless to say that, without a break to pee or put on deodorant, I smell really bad. But since the man next to me smells like fish, I don't mind so much.
- Have you ever noticed the absence of clocks in the terminals? Especially when you're in a hurry.
- If you really think about it, doesn't the whole process of commercial flight seem unnatural? I mean, if you take the body of the plane away, you have 150 people flying in the middle of the sky. Wierd.
- Sometimes I just like to sit at the airport and watch people come and go. I wonder where they're from, where they're going, and what they're going to do when they get there. Then I usually want to laugh at their travel clothing and push them out of my way.
- Flying over the Grand Canyon is one of the greatest in-flight experiences to have. No matter how many times you've seen it, it never fails to be breathtaking. (Unfortunately), it's about the most exciting thing that's happened to me at 35,000 feet.
- When I was younger, I used to want to live at the airport. The excitement of packing a bag and going somewhere else was always exciting. Since I have become more of a traveller, airports and planes make me want to vomit.
- I've decided that I can't decide which is worse: getting to the gate REALLY early and sitting there, or being in a rush to make your flights. The latter makes you sweat from the running, and you could say that for me. To get to flight number 9, I had 27 minutes to run three terminals (no moving walkways, thank you very much LAX) to the very last terminal in the place. To get to my last flight, I had 45 minutes to run down 6 moving walkways (thank you, SFO), take a shuttle, walk on the runway, take an elevator, and three flights of stairs. Needless to say that, without a break to pee or put on deodorant, I smell really bad. But since the man next to me smells like fish, I don't mind so much.
- Have you ever noticed the absence of clocks in the terminals? Especially when you're in a hurry.
- If you really think about it, doesn't the whole process of commercial flight seem unnatural? I mean, if you take the body of the plane away, you have 150 people flying in the middle of the sky. Wierd.
- Sometimes I just like to sit at the airport and watch people come and go. I wonder where they're from, where they're going, and what they're going to do when they get there. Then I usually want to laugh at their travel clothing and push them out of my way.
- Flying over the Grand Canyon is one of the greatest in-flight experiences to have. No matter how many times you've seen it, it never fails to be breathtaking. (Unfortunately), it's about the most exciting thing that's happened to me at 35,000 feet.
Monday, March 31, 2008
How to be a bridesmaid. By Wendy
This past week, I had the pleasure of being a bridesmaid for on of my greatest friendies, Tera, and her husband Zach. Coming to America, mainly for this wedding, was worth every penny (I still fall into random fits of laughter each time I think about it!), and being a part of this party was incredibile. Based on my experiences, I have written a short, but simple list of ideas and directions to follow for any girl who wishes to become a bridesmaid. It's tougher than it looks...
(for privacy purposes, real names will not be used)
1. take care of the bridal party
*when other bridesmaids come home after a few few too many, help clean up the chicken-chunk vomit. also, make sure no members of the bridal party asphyxiate on their own vomit, at any time, during the week. (and, as a trained elementary teacher, vomit clean-up is my speciality...)
*when other bridesmaids make choices that lead to loss of body parts, use quick thinking to remedy the situation. never leave a nail, tooth, or arm behind. instead, carefully take the missing piece and protect it from the elements, i.e. putting the broken tooth in a glass of milk, putting the arm (or eyeball) on ice, etc.
2. make executive decisions
* in the off chance that the liquor, at the reception, starts to disappear faster than anticipated, make a back-handed move, and make a deal to get more, without ever telling the bride and groom. good targets? mother or father of the bride.
3. do everything in your power to make sure the the bride is the best looking one of all, and be very photogenic for the photographer.
*this is an easy one if your bride looks as good as ours did. also easy if you have such good-looking bridesmaids!
4. have a GREAT time at the reception
*sometimes, this includes drinking copious amounts of wine, playing a naughty game of croquet, or flirting with a really good looking groomsman.
5. make sure you let the bride and groom know how happy you are for them.
*(as if a $1200 plane ticket wasn't enough), congrats, Zach and Tera!
Link to wedding photos and slideshow (scroll to near the bottom for photos and links): http://terrismithphoto.com/showit/tera%26zach/
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
watashi wa nihongo ga daikirai desu
I can't tell you what that means until you read all the way through...
----
Tonight I walked out of my Japanese class, in tears, only 10 minutes after it had started. There are many, many reasons, but the top being the difficulty of understanding this dumb, dumb language.
Let me show you what I mean...
Sentence #1:
Isogashii desu kara, doko mo ikimasen.
This translates to 'Because it was busy, I did not go.'
Ok. Fine. I get it. Except that:
isogashii = busy
desu = is
kara* = because
doko = there
mo* = did not
ikimasen = did not go
Put it together, and that sentence literally reads:
'Busy is because there I did not did not go.'
* 'mo' can also mean 'already'
* 'kara' can also mean 'from'
-----
Sentence #2
(this one was a true/false comprehension question from one of my homework problems, which involved answering questions about the content of an interview)
Masuya san no okusan wa ryori ga amari jozu arimasen.
This translates to: His wife does not cook well.
Masuya = a person's name
no = the word used to show possession
okusan = wife
(Masuya san no okusan = Masuya's wife)
ryori = a dish/cooking
amari = not so
jozu - good at
ja arimasen = is not
Literal translation: Masuya's wife cooking but not so good at is not.
I was sure to ask my Japanese teacher why we use 'amari', which, when translated English, makes the sentence a double negative when used along with 'ja arimasen'. She said that in Japan, it is not polite to say that someone is not good at something, so you say that they are not so not good at something. That means more words with double meanings to remember. And the order of the words? Seriously.
Do we live on the same planet as these people?
But, I've played my own little joke. Now I've gotten them back with the title of this blog, which I have worded to say exactly what I mean, without caring if it is polite or not. It's the truth.
I hate Japanese.
;(
----
Tonight I walked out of my Japanese class, in tears, only 10 minutes after it had started. There are many, many reasons, but the top being the difficulty of understanding this dumb, dumb language.
Let me show you what I mean...
Sentence #1:
Isogashii desu kara, doko mo ikimasen.
This translates to 'Because it was busy, I did not go.'
Ok. Fine. I get it. Except that:
isogashii = busy
desu = is
kara* = because
doko = there
mo* = did not
ikimasen = did not go
Put it together, and that sentence literally reads:
'Busy is because there I did not did not go.'
* 'mo' can also mean 'already'
* 'kara' can also mean 'from'
-----
Sentence #2
(this one was a true/false comprehension question from one of my homework problems, which involved answering questions about the content of an interview)
Masuya san no okusan wa ryori ga amari jozu arimasen.
This translates to: His wife does not cook well.
Masuya = a person's name
no = the word used to show possession
okusan = wife
(Masuya san no okusan = Masuya's wife)
ryori = a dish/cooking
amari = not so
jozu - good at
ja arimasen = is not
Literal translation: Masuya's wife cooking but not so good at is not.
I was sure to ask my Japanese teacher why we use 'amari', which, when translated English, makes the sentence a double negative when used along with 'ja arimasen'. She said that in Japan, it is not polite to say that someone is not good at something, so you say that they are not so not good at something. That means more words with double meanings to remember. And the order of the words? Seriously.
Do we live on the same planet as these people?
But, I've played my own little joke. Now I've gotten them back with the title of this blog, which I have worded to say exactly what I mean, without caring if it is polite or not. It's the truth.
I hate Japanese.
;(
Monday, February 18, 2008
Thank you!
From Miss F. and her kids....
After a final surge of piled-up, weekend mail, our goal was met. Although today was the 103rd day of school, we have finally, officially passed our target, with no end of the delivery of more postcards in sight anytime soon.
In fact, at this rate, we'll have 180 postcards by the 180th day of school.
To all who helped out, thank you so much! It was a great project, for me AND the kids.
:)
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Cool Guy
My friend Christian is recently the coolest guy I know.
Why?
Last week, at the Big Gay Out event in Auckland, he and his partner Daniel had their pictures taken with Helen Clark, the prime minister of New Zealand. Fortunately for me, I was granted exclusive rights to this picture by Mr. Brondum (Christian) himself.
So, by default, he is officially the coolest person I know today.
Why?
Last week, at the Big Gay Out event in Auckland, he and his partner Daniel had their pictures taken with Helen Clark, the prime minister of New Zealand. Fortunately for me, I was granted exclusive rights to this picture by Mr. Brondum (Christian) himself.
So, by default, he is officially the coolest person I know today.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Super Quick
A super quick update:
**Please look for an upcoming blog about our postcard project, which was a smashing success. Tomorrow is the 100th day of school, and after receiving 43 postcards today, on day 99 (to add to the 21 we had received last week), we are sure to have 100 by our deadline. Not bad for such late notice...
**My parents have purchased tickets for a trip to Japan this summer, which is very exciting. I have now made it my personal mission to locate and map every western-style toilet that we'll pass during the entire holiday.
**My Aunt Barb told me that she wouldn't take me shopping when I came home unless I finally told everyone that, after the horror and nightmares, I DID actually pass my driver's test on the first try. All four of us did, which was a first for the resource company who helped us out. But hey, what did you expect?
:)wf
**Please look for an upcoming blog about our postcard project, which was a smashing success. Tomorrow is the 100th day of school, and after receiving 43 postcards today, on day 99 (to add to the 21 we had received last week), we are sure to have 100 by our deadline. Not bad for such late notice...
**My parents have purchased tickets for a trip to Japan this summer, which is very exciting. I have now made it my personal mission to locate and map every western-style toilet that we'll pass during the entire holiday.
**My Aunt Barb told me that she wouldn't take me shopping when I came home unless I finally told everyone that, after the horror and nightmares, I DID actually pass my driver's test on the first try. All four of us did, which was a first for the resource company who helped us out. But hey, what did you expect?
:)wf
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Kit Kat Party
When I come back to America in March, I am going to have a Kit Kat party.
If you want to come, you can!
I'll be bringing all sorts of exotic flavors of your favorite Kit-Kat candy. I'm going to present a taste platter that rivals the selection at the finest restaurants, flavors that you cannot find in America.
You'll have a great selection!
Each time I go to a new corner store or grocery chain, I find a new flavor. This past week, I found 5 new ones!
You'll be able to choose from popular fruit flavors such as apple Kit Kat, strawberry Kit Kat, grape Kit Kat, orange Kit Kat, and honeydew Kit Kat (the one that I just don't know why they aren't making in America...).
But, that's not all! There's also vanilla bean Kit Kat, hazelnut Kit Kat, midnight chocolate Kit Kat, matcha (green tea) Kit Kat, caramel Kit Kat, cookies 'n' cream Kit Kat, and cherry blossom Kit Kat.
I'm not going to hold my breath that those are the only flavors. I am sure there'll be more.
I bet you can't wait! I'm really having to hold myself from opening the packages and trying all of these AMAZING flavors... ;)
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Dear Mom,
Help! I'm turning into you!
I told you that I am tirelessly playing mommy to a family of 4, right? Well, that gig thankfully runs out on Sunday night. I am off all day on Monday, and wholly plan on spending it in retail therapy, shopping my arse off, trying to rid myself of the smell of children who aren't mine.
This experience, however, has not lacked its share of interesting experiences, both humbling and amusing, one of which I especially want to share with you...
This past week, on the way to school, the children were warily riding along in the car on the way to school. In Nagoya, there is only one station that plays non-Japanese music, and, out of lack of options, we had it on. To the kids' dismay, this station is known for playing more 'retro' music, and obviously isn't their favorite, but beats the option of alternative Japanese jibberish.
My mom moment?
It happened before I could even stop myself...
It started that same morning, when I heard the familiar voice of Phil Collins. I was singing along to the words, and I had just begun to say, 'Ooh! I love this so--,' when I noticed that all 4 kids were staring at me like I was an alien.
I guess they aren't Genesis fans.
And then, at that moment, I felt like you, who used to get the alien look from me when really dumb songs from the 70's would come on in the car.
Now, Mother, I humbly bow down and apologize to you.
And I guess, while I am at it, thank you for always cooking my meals. Even the ones I didn't like. I am sorry I probably never said thank you. Except for taco casserole, the mere mention of which will still get you the alien look...
;)
I told you that I am tirelessly playing mommy to a family of 4, right? Well, that gig thankfully runs out on Sunday night. I am off all day on Monday, and wholly plan on spending it in retail therapy, shopping my arse off, trying to rid myself of the smell of children who aren't mine.
This experience, however, has not lacked its share of interesting experiences, both humbling and amusing, one of which I especially want to share with you...
This past week, on the way to school, the children were warily riding along in the car on the way to school. In Nagoya, there is only one station that plays non-Japanese music, and, out of lack of options, we had it on. To the kids' dismay, this station is known for playing more 'retro' music, and obviously isn't their favorite, but beats the option of alternative Japanese jibberish.
My mom moment?
It happened before I could even stop myself...
It started that same morning, when I heard the familiar voice of Phil Collins. I was singing along to the words, and I had just begun to say, 'Ooh! I love this so--,' when I noticed that all 4 kids were staring at me like I was an alien.
I guess they aren't Genesis fans.
And then, at that moment, I felt like you, who used to get the alien look from me when really dumb songs from the 70's would come on in the car.
Now, Mother, I humbly bow down and apologize to you.
And I guess, while I am at it, thank you for always cooking my meals. Even the ones I didn't like. I am sorry I probably never said thank you. Except for taco casserole, the mere mention of which will still get you the alien look...
;)
Friday, February 01, 2008
Help us out!
Hello all!
I am looking for your quick help for a project I'd like to do with my kiddos...
Taking an idea from some fabulous teachers in Iowa, my class of students and I are trying to collect 100 postcards, from around the world, to celebrate the 100th day of school.
My kiddos have all taken notes home with them this weekend, and will start asking family and friends as well, but since I have so many great family, friends, former students, co-workers, and so on, I wanted to ask all of you too!
So... please help us out!?!
We would love a postcard from you, from wherever, and from any of your friends (so pass it on!) to be sent to us! But you'll have to act fast, as the 100th day of school is rapidly approaching (February 12!). The postal service is quite fast here, and if the postcard is in the mail by next Thursday (the 7th) at the latest, there should be no problem getting it on time.
Here is the address:
Miss F. and 2B
Nagoya International School
2686 Minimihara
Nakishidami
Moriyama-ku
Nagoya
Japan
463-0002
Again, pass it on, spread the word, and we'll see just how many people, from all over the world, we really know! And, chances are, we can sing your national anthem too...
Thank you!
:)Wendy
I am looking for your quick help for a project I'd like to do with my kiddos...
Taking an idea from some fabulous teachers in Iowa, my class of students and I are trying to collect 100 postcards, from around the world, to celebrate the 100th day of school.
My kiddos have all taken notes home with them this weekend, and will start asking family and friends as well, but since I have so many great family, friends, former students, co-workers, and so on, I wanted to ask all of you too!
So... please help us out!?!
We would love a postcard from you, from wherever, and from any of your friends (so pass it on!) to be sent to us! But you'll have to act fast, as the 100th day of school is rapidly approaching (February 12!). The postal service is quite fast here, and if the postcard is in the mail by next Thursday (the 7th) at the latest, there should be no problem getting it on time.
Here is the address:
Miss F. and 2B
Nagoya International School
2686 Minimihara
Nakishidami
Moriyama-ku
Nagoya
Japan
463-0002
Again, pass it on, spread the word, and we'll see just how many people, from all over the world, we really know! And, chances are, we can sing your national anthem too...
Thank you!
:)Wendy
I swear...
...all the time!
(parental caution on this one, folks - PLEASE do not read any further if you are a young child or one of my grandparents!!)
Swearing.
It's one of my FAVORITE things to do in Japan!
Why?
Because no one knows what the bloody hell I am saying! Ever!
My favorite line, as I'm fleeing down the slopes, out of control?
'Out of the way, b#%@*es!'
We all do, it, though. Because we can, we drop f- and s- bombs ALL the time. And to be honest, when you're living here, it's nice to have a bit of freedom in your words, something you can have a laugh about with your friends, while not actually offending others.
I only mention this because yesterday, I was pleased to find out it's not just me. Justin and Kerianne are the same (no, Mom, it's not JUST me, I promise!). They have come to affectionately refer to their car as D.M.F., where the first word is 'Dozo' which means 'Please' in Japanese. Sometimes, for fun, we say it (the name of the car) under our breath to people as we hold doors open. A favorite target? The elderly, who just bow, smile and say thank you.
You're welcome, b$%&#es.
(parental caution on this one, folks - PLEASE do not read any further if you are a young child or one of my grandparents!!)
Swearing.
It's one of my FAVORITE things to do in Japan!
Why?
Because no one knows what the bloody hell I am saying! Ever!
My favorite line, as I'm fleeing down the slopes, out of control?
'Out of the way, b#%@*es!'
We all do, it, though. Because we can, we drop f- and s- bombs ALL the time. And to be honest, when you're living here, it's nice to have a bit of freedom in your words, something you can have a laugh about with your friends, while not actually offending others.
I only mention this because yesterday, I was pleased to find out it's not just me. Justin and Kerianne are the same (no, Mom, it's not JUST me, I promise!). They have come to affectionately refer to their car as D.M.F., where the first word is 'Dozo' which means 'Please' in Japanese. Sometimes, for fun, we say it (the name of the car) under our breath to people as we hold doors open. A favorite target? The elderly, who just bow, smile and say thank you.
You're welcome, b$%&#es.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
The drive.... (part 3)
(please access parts one and two of this fabulous and nail-biting adventure before reading below...)
Day 3
With sick stomachs, swollen eyes, and weary heads, we four headed once again, for the third time in a week, to the driver's licensing station.
Kerianne and I prayed for course B. Todd and Justin, both male, and in the lead for passing, didn't care either way. Todd, the zen master, was bound to score due to his calm nature, impressive demeanor, and fluent Japanese tongue. Justin, who is a master of all trades, was bound to pass just because he is Justin. Kerianne, who was reduced to tears during practice runs, and myself, who heard nary an encouraging word about my excellent driving skills, knew we were doomed. But course B it was for us four.
Zen-master Todd agreed to go first, which was probably a bad idea for the rest of us. He smoothly finessed the course with ease, and as the Japanese instructor debriefed to our translator after his run, he secretly translated himself, and informed us that the instructor had paid him a complement, a rare, rare occurence in Japan. If only one of us was going to pass today, we had decided it was going to be Todd.
Kerianne, nervous-as, but confident, went as well. Although a bit slow, she did very well, and in the debriefing, the translator, whom Kerianne was fortunate enough to have had the night before, informed the Japanese instructor that the previous night's practice instructor had been impressed with her driving skills. One point for Kerianne.
Justin just did it. That was all there was. He just did it.
Now as for me, I myself am not a zen-master, nor did I have the confidence of Justin, or the kind words from any translator (and even if he had been there, he still would have found some way to put me down!) that Kerianne had. I knew, that of all four of us, I would be the only one to fail...
One thing I did well? I remembered the EXACT order of operation upon entry of the car (and if you think I'm joking about exact, I am not:
lock the door,
adjust your seat,
adjust the mirror with your LEFT HAND ONLY,
fasten seatbelt,
footbrake,
turn on car,
shift into drive,
release emergency brake,
indicator,
look left, right, left,
and
pull out, parallel, while missing the curb.
Although my driving was ok, I did miss an indicator during one turn, and forgot to check for bikers two times. I just knew I was doomed. The wait time between test and results was torture - three hours to wait, wondering, just to find out, as I was sure, that I had failed.
(is this dramatic enough for you yet??!)
Day 3
With sick stomachs, swollen eyes, and weary heads, we four headed once again, for the third time in a week, to the driver's licensing station.
Kerianne and I prayed for course B. Todd and Justin, both male, and in the lead for passing, didn't care either way. Todd, the zen master, was bound to score due to his calm nature, impressive demeanor, and fluent Japanese tongue. Justin, who is a master of all trades, was bound to pass just because he is Justin. Kerianne, who was reduced to tears during practice runs, and myself, who heard nary an encouraging word about my excellent driving skills, knew we were doomed. But course B it was for us four.
Zen-master Todd agreed to go first, which was probably a bad idea for the rest of us. He smoothly finessed the course with ease, and as the Japanese instructor debriefed to our translator after his run, he secretly translated himself, and informed us that the instructor had paid him a complement, a rare, rare occurence in Japan. If only one of us was going to pass today, we had decided it was going to be Todd.
Kerianne, nervous-as, but confident, went as well. Although a bit slow, she did very well, and in the debriefing, the translator, whom Kerianne was fortunate enough to have had the night before, informed the Japanese instructor that the previous night's practice instructor had been impressed with her driving skills. One point for Kerianne.
Justin just did it. That was all there was. He just did it.
Now as for me, I myself am not a zen-master, nor did I have the confidence of Justin, or the kind words from any translator (and even if he had been there, he still would have found some way to put me down!) that Kerianne had. I knew, that of all four of us, I would be the only one to fail...
One thing I did well? I remembered the EXACT order of operation upon entry of the car (and if you think I'm joking about exact, I am not:
lock the door,
adjust your seat,
adjust the mirror with your LEFT HAND ONLY,
fasten seatbelt,
footbrake,
turn on car,
shift into drive,
release emergency brake,
indicator,
look left, right, left,
and
pull out, parallel, while missing the curb.
Although my driving was ok, I did miss an indicator during one turn, and forgot to check for bikers two times. I just knew I was doomed. The wait time between test and results was torture - three hours to wait, wondering, just to find out, as I was sure, that I had failed.
(is this dramatic enough for you yet??!)
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
The drive.... (part 2)
(please refer to part one of this trilogy before reading below)
Day 2
The theory of the driving test in Japan is much like it is like really LIVING in Japan. You don't do things the way you have done or know is right, but instead, you do it just like they tell you, whether you agree or not. And if you don't agree, you fail.
We showed up a week later for the mandatory $70 practice tests, where we got to get in the car with a Japanese driving instructor, and a gaijin (foreign) translator. Luckily for me (as has been my luck all week), I got to ride with the dopey gaijin, the only male, who, unfortunately, didn't have a kind or encouraging word for me all night. It obviously was very helpful on my self-esteem and confidence for the real test...
The driver's course consists of two routes. You have to memorize and perfect both, as you are told 30 minutes before the real test which one you'll be driving.
The first instructor told my gaijin that I was driving so fast (yes, I know, Mom, it is hard to picture) that he 'was sweating like a pig.' Really, guys, I was CONVINCED I was crawling at snail pace.
The second instructor had no issues at all and I did well. Shocker that my gaijin still had nothing nice to say. At all.
On the way home, my friendies and I went over and over the courses in preparation for the next day's test. We talked and talked and talked and talked until we were blue in the face, and although it might not seem like a big deal, it really, really was. Failing meant humiliation, failure, more costs, days off schools, sub plans to be made, appointments for practices and tests, and more paperwork.
To give you an idea of how traumatic this all was, let me top all of that off with some rumored facts, that were shared with us by coworkers during the weeks leading up to the test:
Only 1 out of every 5 people passes.
Low-cut shirts won't help.
If you bump a curb, you fail.
Our school's average pass rate is 3 tries.
Women don't pass.
Men don't pass.
Old people don't pass.
If you're too young you won't pass.
You won't pass.
Needless to say, when I got home, all of my fingernails were gone (much to the dismay of my second graders, who were banking on me to win a nail-biting contest with the principal) and I had accidentally eaten a whole column of a package of Oreos (much to the dismay of my friend Tera, who wants me to lose an inch off of my waist in order to fit into my bridesmaid dress in March).
It was a rough and sleepless night.
Day 2
The theory of the driving test in Japan is much like it is like really LIVING in Japan. You don't do things the way you have done or know is right, but instead, you do it just like they tell you, whether you agree or not. And if you don't agree, you fail.
We showed up a week later for the mandatory $70 practice tests, where we got to get in the car with a Japanese driving instructor, and a gaijin (foreign) translator. Luckily for me (as has been my luck all week), I got to ride with the dopey gaijin, the only male, who, unfortunately, didn't have a kind or encouraging word for me all night. It obviously was very helpful on my self-esteem and confidence for the real test...
The driver's course consists of two routes. You have to memorize and perfect both, as you are told 30 minutes before the real test which one you'll be driving.
The first instructor told my gaijin that I was driving so fast (yes, I know, Mom, it is hard to picture) that he 'was sweating like a pig.' Really, guys, I was CONVINCED I was crawling at snail pace.
The second instructor had no issues at all and I did well. Shocker that my gaijin still had nothing nice to say. At all.
On the way home, my friendies and I went over and over the courses in preparation for the next day's test. We talked and talked and talked and talked until we were blue in the face, and although it might not seem like a big deal, it really, really was. Failing meant humiliation, failure, more costs, days off schools, sub plans to be made, appointments for practices and tests, and more paperwork.
To give you an idea of how traumatic this all was, let me top all of that off with some rumored facts, that were shared with us by coworkers during the weeks leading up to the test:
Only 1 out of every 5 people passes.
Low-cut shirts won't help.
If you bump a curb, you fail.
Our school's average pass rate is 3 tries.
Women don't pass.
Men don't pass.
Old people don't pass.
If you're too young you won't pass.
You won't pass.
Needless to say, when I got home, all of my fingernails were gone (much to the dismay of my second graders, who were banking on me to win a nail-biting contest with the principal) and I had accidentally eaten a whole column of a package of Oreos (much to the dismay of my friend Tera, who wants me to lose an inch off of my waist in order to fit into my bridesmaid dress in March).
It was a rough and sleepless night.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
The drive...
Trying to obtain a legal driver's license in Japan is absolute carnage.
The 57 point process is neither easy or quick, and begins long before new teachers arrive in Japan. The moment our positions are secured, we are asked to submit paperwork and copies of current licenses to our school secretary, so that as early as January (it was May for me), the conversion of paperwork and legal documents for the licensing process can begin.
Although I know how the story ends, my flair for the dramatic is now kicking in. Therefore I have to say that this story is so awful (which isn't far from the truth), that I can only bear to tell it to you in multiple parts...
Day 1
On day one, myself and 4 of my coworkers headed down to the driver's licensing station, which is one hour from where we live, to turn in our paper work and take the written and vision tests that are required before we have to take the actual road test. I drove my own car with my pal Todd, and my other friends, Justin, Kumi, and Karianne drove in the car ahead. We made it on time, no problem.
The Japanese are very thorough about EVERYTHING, and Kumi, being Japanese/Venezuelan with three passports had issues from the start with her paperwork. We were told at first that Kumi would likely not make it through the paperwork process, but, being wrapped up in our own talk, we just gave an 'awww' and went on our way. When my turn at the window came, I was feeling good and ready to go. I mean, it's just confirming paperwork, right?
Wrong.
It turns out that when I was hired, in May, and sent a copy of my Iowa driver's license to the school, in May, they neglected to tell me that if I were to renew my Iowa driver's license before coming to Japan, which I did when I was home in June, that I would need to submit new copies of my new license. Since I didn't, the months of paperwork that had started in May, were invalid, since the license I showed (new Iowa driver's license, obtained in June) did not match the copy they had.
Wendy was done.
It didn't make me feel better that Kumi made it through just fine, no issues. I was the only one of the four who was told I couldn't get my Japanese license.
Luckily, by the good graces of other gaijin (foreigners), I was able to work with the HR lady to, that day, obtain the necessary translations of my current license, and made it back to the center on time, barely, to take my test. My friends, having passed the test three hours earlier, while I was making a wild goose chase around town, had left hours before I did, leaving me alone in the cold, smelly Japanese office that is the driver's license station. I was able to take the written test, and passed, but barely.
Needless to say, many tears were shed that day.
The 57 point process is neither easy or quick, and begins long before new teachers arrive in Japan. The moment our positions are secured, we are asked to submit paperwork and copies of current licenses to our school secretary, so that as early as January (it was May for me), the conversion of paperwork and legal documents for the licensing process can begin.
Although I know how the story ends, my flair for the dramatic is now kicking in. Therefore I have to say that this story is so awful (which isn't far from the truth), that I can only bear to tell it to you in multiple parts...
Day 1
On day one, myself and 4 of my coworkers headed down to the driver's licensing station, which is one hour from where we live, to turn in our paper work and take the written and vision tests that are required before we have to take the actual road test. I drove my own car with my pal Todd, and my other friends, Justin, Kumi, and Karianne drove in the car ahead. We made it on time, no problem.
The Japanese are very thorough about EVERYTHING, and Kumi, being Japanese/Venezuelan with three passports had issues from the start with her paperwork. We were told at first that Kumi would likely not make it through the paperwork process, but, being wrapped up in our own talk, we just gave an 'awww' and went on our way. When my turn at the window came, I was feeling good and ready to go. I mean, it's just confirming paperwork, right?
Wrong.
It turns out that when I was hired, in May, and sent a copy of my Iowa driver's license to the school, in May, they neglected to tell me that if I were to renew my Iowa driver's license before coming to Japan, which I did when I was home in June, that I would need to submit new copies of my new license. Since I didn't, the months of paperwork that had started in May, were invalid, since the license I showed (new Iowa driver's license, obtained in June) did not match the copy they had.
Wendy was done.
It didn't make me feel better that Kumi made it through just fine, no issues. I was the only one of the four who was told I couldn't get my Japanese license.
Luckily, by the good graces of other gaijin (foreigners), I was able to work with the HR lady to, that day, obtain the necessary translations of my current license, and made it back to the center on time, barely, to take my test. My friends, having passed the test three hours earlier, while I was making a wild goose chase around town, had left hours before I did, leaving me alone in the cold, smelly Japanese office that is the driver's license station. I was able to take the written test, and passed, but barely.
Needless to say, many tears were shed that day.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Being a novice
My life is busy, in a self-inflicted kind of way. I won't bore you with the details (because that WOULD be boring), but for the sake of my mother, who always loves to hear how I am, the answer is fine.
But enough! Today I am going to write about my new passion: skiing.
Do you know how much it costs to ski? To gear up and really ski? A lot.
In the last two weeks, I've bought a new ski jacket, ski gloves, ski goggles, ski shirts, ski socks, ski poles, ski boots and a ski bag. The only thing I haven't bought? Skis.
My friends are die-hard skiers. I suck at skiing. So, much like my life (sigh), I am faced to ski the green slopes by my lonesome. But, I don't mind. It's just another part of this routine I call Japan.
Have I ever told you how much it costs to live in Japan? It's a lot. (And what does this have to do with skiing, you ask? I'm getting to that...).
You see, when you live abroad (or maybe it's just me), it doesn't feel like you are really living, but more like you're on vacation. So, you spend money as if it were coming out your ear (really, maybe it's just me). Did I flinch last week when I did buy those skiing gloves for $60? Maybe for a moment. The ski boots for $300? I didn't bat an eyelash.
This weekend, in an attempt to NOT be such a novice, I am even having private ski lessons. It is my goal, now, to ski well by the time I leave Japan. I can officially say that I have been skiing this month more than I have ever been in my life, and I am loving it. Good thing too, for the sake of all my new gear. Seriously.
So, Nagano (yes, that's where they held the winter olympics!), here I come.
Small children, beware. I am taller, faster, and heavier than you (and my brakes don't work yet...)
But enough! Today I am going to write about my new passion: skiing.
Do you know how much it costs to ski? To gear up and really ski? A lot.
In the last two weeks, I've bought a new ski jacket, ski gloves, ski goggles, ski shirts, ski socks, ski poles, ski boots and a ski bag. The only thing I haven't bought? Skis.
My friends are die-hard skiers. I suck at skiing. So, much like my life (sigh), I am faced to ski the green slopes by my lonesome. But, I don't mind. It's just another part of this routine I call Japan.
Have I ever told you how much it costs to live in Japan? It's a lot. (And what does this have to do with skiing, you ask? I'm getting to that...).
You see, when you live abroad (or maybe it's just me), it doesn't feel like you are really living, but more like you're on vacation. So, you spend money as if it were coming out your ear (really, maybe it's just me). Did I flinch last week when I did buy those skiing gloves for $60? Maybe for a moment. The ski boots for $300? I didn't bat an eyelash.
This weekend, in an attempt to NOT be such a novice, I am even having private ski lessons. It is my goal, now, to ski well by the time I leave Japan. I can officially say that I have been skiing this month more than I have ever been in my life, and I am loving it. Good thing too, for the sake of all my new gear. Seriously.
So, Nagano (yes, that's where they held the winter olympics!), here I come.
Small children, beware. I am taller, faster, and heavier than you (and my brakes don't work yet...)
Friday, January 04, 2008
Things I've Come To Expect in Japan
When I go shopping, I have to take off my shoes before entering a dressing room.
While I'm changing, a GOOD saleslady will turn my shoes around for me so that when I come out of the dressing room, they are facing ahead and I can just slip them on.
OTHER sales ladies will forsake the shoes altogether and just snicker (or, as on a recent trip to a local store, openly laugh) at me when I go in. I am never sure why. Sometimes the don't stop until I leave the store. Even after I've proved that my rear (snugly) fits into the same jeans as their rears do.
-----
Small children will stare at me wherever I go.
When I am feeling nice, I will smile at them.
Sometimes I wave.
And if I'm grumpy, I stick out my tongue.
It's funny, though, that no matter which of the three I do, they always huddle closer to their mommies.
-----
When I go to Daiso (my favorite store) in heels, I can see over the top of all the aisles. Which makes shopping truly convenient. Especially when trying to find friends who I'm shopping with. Or brooms or something.
-----
The nicest people (consistently) are those who work at Starbucks. Or, at least, I guess those are the ones I see the most. So, maybe that's a bias opinion.
-----
Telemarketers and street sellers avoid me like the plague. (woo hoo!)
In fact, the look on the door-to-door salesperson's face when the door opens and they see me is PRICELESS...
----
When I go to the petrol station, I order legulah gas.
And I am quietly accepting the fact that it will be years before I can order Pizza Hut. Sigh...
----
It's just what you come to expect as the norm, I guess. Maybe it's what keeps life interesting. You know, legulah gas and all.
:)wf
While I'm changing, a GOOD saleslady will turn my shoes around for me so that when I come out of the dressing room, they are facing ahead and I can just slip them on.
OTHER sales ladies will forsake the shoes altogether and just snicker (or, as on a recent trip to a local store, openly laugh) at me when I go in. I am never sure why. Sometimes the don't stop until I leave the store. Even after I've proved that my rear (snugly) fits into the same jeans as their rears do.
-----
Small children will stare at me wherever I go.
When I am feeling nice, I will smile at them.
Sometimes I wave.
And if I'm grumpy, I stick out my tongue.
It's funny, though, that no matter which of the three I do, they always huddle closer to their mommies.
-----
When I go to Daiso (my favorite store) in heels, I can see over the top of all the aisles. Which makes shopping truly convenient. Especially when trying to find friends who I'm shopping with. Or brooms or something.
-----
The nicest people (consistently) are those who work at Starbucks. Or, at least, I guess those are the ones I see the most. So, maybe that's a bias opinion.
-----
Telemarketers and street sellers avoid me like the plague. (woo hoo!)
In fact, the look on the door-to-door salesperson's face when the door opens and they see me is PRICELESS...
----
When I go to the petrol station, I order legulah gas.
And I am quietly accepting the fact that it will be years before I can order Pizza Hut. Sigh...
----
It's just what you come to expect as the norm, I guess. Maybe it's what keeps life interesting. You know, legulah gas and all.
:)wf
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Cacusing
The COOLEST thing about the 2008 elections?
The Iowa caucuses!
Why?
Because EVERYBODY in the world is reporting from there!
And why is that cool?
Well, it works to my advantage that EVERY news show is being broadcast from the streets that I remember and love and see so little of.
:)
In fact, on tonight's Evening News (CBS) and yesterday's Today Show (NBC), both did a bio on Iowa and the people. I'm just searching for someone I know.
But, as someone with an ear out in the world, rumors spread that Iowa may be relieved of it's primary caucus position if more people don't get out and vote. A little more than 10% of people are expected to turn out (in a state where 94% of the population is white, another political mark against us!).
So, get out there! Caucus! Come on Iowa, you can do it!
(and keep those cameras rolling!)
The Iowa caucuses!
Why?
Because EVERYBODY in the world is reporting from there!
And why is that cool?
Well, it works to my advantage that EVERY news show is being broadcast from the streets that I remember and love and see so little of.
:)
In fact, on tonight's Evening News (CBS) and yesterday's Today Show (NBC), both did a bio on Iowa and the people. I'm just searching for someone I know.
But, as someone with an ear out in the world, rumors spread that Iowa may be relieved of it's primary caucus position if more people don't get out and vote. A little more than 10% of people are expected to turn out (in a state where 94% of the population is white, another political mark against us!).
So, get out there! Caucus! Come on Iowa, you can do it!
(and keep those cameras rolling!)
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Survivor Man
Err... Survivor Girl, that is...
Have you ever heard of the show Survivor Man? They take this guy and put him in the most random places in the world to fend for himself and live off of what the land gives him. Like the show Survivor, but just for one person. I always thought it sounded like a great concept for a show, until I became Survivor Girl. Yesterday...
Imagine, if you will, the WORLDS WORST POSSIBLE SCENARIO. I found myself in it yesterday...
I was driving down the street (lah de dah) in my friends Roger and Kerry's car, on my way to the bus station to pick them up from their trip home. I made the choice to take my eyes off the road for two or three moments, and before I could look back up again, I hit a curb, immediately flattening the front tire.
Crap.
So, I pulled into an empty lot to check the damage and assess the situation. My assessment is as follows:
1. I've just wrecked someone else's car.
2. It's bloody freezing outside.
3. I know how to fix a tire, but can't be bothered to get out in the cold to do it.
4. I don't speak the language and can't call for help.
5. EVERYONE I know is out of the country. EVERYONE (not just most people, mind you).
6. It's a holiday - nothing is open.
So, I check my mobile phonebook to make sure there's nobody I can call, and I find Kumi's number. My friends Kumi and Daniel are around, in fact, I am slated to have dinner with them later in the evening. I call and call and call, but Kumi doesn't answer her phone. I don't have her home phone, or Daniel's mobile.
Crap.
I'll just have to fix the tire myself.
Easy enough, I guess, until I opened up the boot and realized that Roger doesn't have a tire kit in his trunk. A tire, yes, but no tools to fix it. No jack, no wrench, no nothing.
--
So, let's review: I can't fix the tire as there are no tools. I can't call for help from a friend, I can't communicate with the locals, and it's a holiday, so everything is closed.
Crap.
What would you do?
Have you ever heard of the show Survivor Man? They take this guy and put him in the most random places in the world to fend for himself and live off of what the land gives him. Like the show Survivor, but just for one person. I always thought it sounded like a great concept for a show, until I became Survivor Girl. Yesterday...
Imagine, if you will, the WORLDS WORST POSSIBLE SCENARIO. I found myself in it yesterday...
I was driving down the street (lah de dah) in my friends Roger and Kerry's car, on my way to the bus station to pick them up from their trip home. I made the choice to take my eyes off the road for two or three moments, and before I could look back up again, I hit a curb, immediately flattening the front tire.
Crap.
So, I pulled into an empty lot to check the damage and assess the situation. My assessment is as follows:
1. I've just wrecked someone else's car.
2. It's bloody freezing outside.
3. I know how to fix a tire, but can't be bothered to get out in the cold to do it.
4. I don't speak the language and can't call for help.
5. EVERYONE I know is out of the country. EVERYONE (not just most people, mind you).
6. It's a holiday - nothing is open.
So, I check my mobile phonebook to make sure there's nobody I can call, and I find Kumi's number. My friends Kumi and Daniel are around, in fact, I am slated to have dinner with them later in the evening. I call and call and call, but Kumi doesn't answer her phone. I don't have her home phone, or Daniel's mobile.
Crap.
I'll just have to fix the tire myself.
Easy enough, I guess, until I opened up the boot and realized that Roger doesn't have a tire kit in his trunk. A tire, yes, but no tools to fix it. No jack, no wrench, no nothing.
--
So, let's review: I can't fix the tire as there are no tools. I can't call for help from a friend, I can't communicate with the locals, and it's a holiday, so everything is closed.
Crap.
What would you do?
Sunday, December 30, 2007
December
Boy, I suck at keeping up.
I am embarrassed that my last blog entry was from November 11! Yikes!
December was a busy month, naturally, at school and at home. Life is good though, and a lot has happened this month.
Update:
My first semester at NIS wrapped up uneventfully. Our school holiday is three weeks long, which is a welcome rest.
I have not yet taught the students the Macarena, but will very soon.
I rearrange my house at least one time a week. It puts a new perspective on things, and makes me feel like I have all new stuff. It's like shopping, but free.
Now that my Bali holiday has ended, I am beginning to save up for my trip home in March. That is, when I stop shopping, which I've been doing (and will continue to do) for the next week of break. You know, it's funny, when you start making more money, you actually go out and spend it on all the things you wish you could have had when you were poor, thus making you just as poor. Only now you own more crap.
On top of teaching each day, I am also tutoring five students a week and teaching 6 adult English classes per month. In February, I'll be house/kid sitting for a family at school who will pay me to stay with their kids (one of which is my own student).
My classroom has now been equipped with one of the only two interactive white boards in the school. It was installed over break. To get an idea of this piece of technology, imagine your computer projected onto a giant white board that lets you touch and drag and click by using your finger. It's pretty amazing, and I am honored to get the chance to use it and share my learning with colleagues.
I am missing all of my family and friends back home, but am content knowing that you are all healthy and happy.
Happy December. See you in January...
I am embarrassed that my last blog entry was from November 11! Yikes!
December was a busy month, naturally, at school and at home. Life is good though, and a lot has happened this month.
Update:
My first semester at NIS wrapped up uneventfully. Our school holiday is three weeks long, which is a welcome rest.
I have not yet taught the students the Macarena, but will very soon.
I rearrange my house at least one time a week. It puts a new perspective on things, and makes me feel like I have all new stuff. It's like shopping, but free.
Now that my Bali holiday has ended, I am beginning to save up for my trip home in March. That is, when I stop shopping, which I've been doing (and will continue to do) for the next week of break. You know, it's funny, when you start making more money, you actually go out and spend it on all the things you wish you could have had when you were poor, thus making you just as poor. Only now you own more crap.
On top of teaching each day, I am also tutoring five students a week and teaching 6 adult English classes per month. In February, I'll be house/kid sitting for a family at school who will pay me to stay with their kids (one of which is my own student).
My classroom has now been equipped with one of the only two interactive white boards in the school. It was installed over break. To get an idea of this piece of technology, imagine your computer projected onto a giant white board that lets you touch and drag and click by using your finger. It's pretty amazing, and I am honored to get the chance to use it and share my learning with colleagues.
I am missing all of my family and friends back home, but am content knowing that you are all healthy and happy.
Happy December. See you in January...
Friday, December 28, 2007
Baliday
My Baliday
By Miss F.
(before leaving for break, I assigned each student a writing journal, in which they were to write one page each day of break. in an effort to more effortlessly share my bali trip with you, I am going to share my journal (it's only fair that I had to write one too), in about a dozen short installments, to share part of my Baliday with you. it's a quick read, if you're interested, and contains just a few pictures. please note that internet links are a bonus for you, and will not be available for my second grade students.)
----------------
December 16, 2007
Ouch!
Today was a painful day!
Miss Pruce and I went together to get our eyebrows waxed, and it was not very nice. First, they put hot wax on your eyebrows, then a strip of cotton over it. Lastly, they yank the cotton off, peeling all the hairs with it - ouch! In the end, though, my eyebrows looked great.
Late in the evening, I realized that my flight left at 9:00 am on Monday, not 9:00 pm, like I had thought. Oops! I had to pack really, really quickly, and scramble to find a ride to the airport in the morning. Luckily, Mr. Webb was able to take me bright and early. I hope I make it!
----------------
December 17
On My Way
I made it on time!
Sometimes traveling alone is really boring. Luckily, I had lots of tv and movies on my Ipod. While it was charging at the Korean airport, though, I took a break and studied my Japanese. While I was doing it, I ate a whole bag of Korean pumpkin candies. Yum!
Also today I have four different currencies (kinds of money) in my wallet - dollars (American), won (Korean), rupee (Indonesian), and yen (Japanese). I didn't really need the won, I just bought it for fun! :) My wallet is now very colorful inside!
p.s. I was so excited this evening - on my long flight between Seoul and Bali, the airline ran out of room in the plane, so I got to sit in first class! You should have seen me giggling at my luck! My seat was huge and reclined almost to a bed. But the best part was that I got to watch heaps of movie from my own personal screen, and I chose High School Musical 2, which I have been dying to see! Yay!
----------------
December 18
Contiki Bali
I really like my first resort. There are 5 pools and a spa. On day 1, I got a pedicure (for my feet) and a facial (for my face). In fact, today I booked massages for every day of my stay. How exciting!
I have already met a lot of really nice people and it has been a lot of fun. Tonight for dinner there will be fajitas, a Mexican dish that is one of my favorites. Right now, though, I am headed out shopping - I love spending money!
Contiki Bali Resort
----------------
December 19
Surf's Up!
Day one of surf school today - how cool!
When I took a holiday in Australia, I tried surfing but did not like it. So, I thought I would try it again here. It was much easier, and my instructor was great. On my first try I was up on the board surfing, and by the end of the day, I looked like a pro! I've got two more days of lessons, so I am going to get really good, hopefully. Now, if I can only get over the board rash on my legs...
----------------
December 20
Charlie and Helen
I tried surf school again today, but had to stop because my knees were so sore and bruised. I will finish my surf lessons next week. One of the boys I was surfing with, Charlie, was American. I was very surprised, though, to find out that he and his family live in Japan! I gave him my e-mail address and hopefully we'll stay in touch!
Tonight, while I was eating dinner with friends, I noticed a girl sitting alone, so I invited her to sit with us. Her name was Helen, and although she is British, she lives in Japan too! Can you believe it? It's such a small world...
----------------
December 21
Petra the Pachyderm
Today was supposed to be my last day of surfing school, but instead, I pushed back my lessons to next week so I'd have time to recover and feel better. I decided instead to go on safari today with some friends. We got in a van and drove a long way up to a volcano. When we got there, we got on bikes and rode all the way back down, through villages, seeing native peoples. My favorite part was laughing and playing with a group of local kiddos in a small village. They were so cute and had so little (very few toys - no tv...), but they were so happy. It was a wonderful experience.
On the last part of our trip, we rode our bikes into an elephant safari park. We had a great lunch and then got to ride the elephants. I've never been on an elephant before - it was a really neat feeling. In the picture is Helen and myself on Petra, our elephant.
----------------
December 22
Getting better all the time!
My Baliday is really getting good!
Today I left Contiki to move into another, more quiet part of Bali. My room at my new hotel is really beautiful, like being in a palace (pictured). I ordered food, which was brought directly to my room - I didn't even have to get up!
Unfortunately, this hotel only had one night for me, the other two nights that I needed were full - so I was a bit worried. But, things always seem to work out, and they are building a new, fancier hotel next door, which they are giving me a room in to stay for my last two nights. This hotel next door is even nicer than the one I am in - if you can imagine that! They are very expensive, but, since they are under construction, they are letting me stay there very cheap, at about half of the price of what a night will cost when the hotel is finished...
Honeymoon Guesthouse, Bali
----------------
December 23
Nature
Have you actually ever been woken by a rooster's cock-a-doodle-doo? I can now say that I have, but not by 1, but by 5, crowing for an hour, begging me to get up. Good morning! Good morning!
I visited with Mr. and Mrs. Genest today - they are staying in the same town as me! I met them at their hotel, and we went to see the monkeys at the Monkey Palace. There were so many monkeys, and wild too! Once, when I bent down to take a picture of one monkey, another jumped on my back! They were selling bananas to feed to them, but I didn't buy any because they were making the monkeys CRAZY!
----------------
December 24
Retail Therapy
Today I am on my own for the first day since I've come. I was in a good mood this morning because I slept so well in my new place - the sheets were like silk! Amazing animal noises kept waking me up all night, but I didn't mind. It's neat to sleep in the middle of the open. I am just glad my bed has a netting around it to keep the bugs OUT!
When I went shopping today, the clouds opened up and it rained for 5 hours! So, I bought a magazine and sat down at a little cafe. I ordered a chocolate-avocado juice because I thought it would be interesting to try. I didn't really like it, but now ta least I know not to want to try it again!
----------------
December 25
Christmas Dinner (x2)
Today I said goodbye to my great room (the picture, right, is the upstairs and downstairs, the entire unit which was mine during this stay), but not before taking my hand at Balinese cooking. I figured spending Christmas lunch learning how to cook great Bali foods would be really fun, and I was not disappointed.
After lunch, a cab picked me up and took me all the way back to my third and final hotel in Kuta, about an hour from where I had been. After relaxing for about an hour, Mr. and Mrs. Genest came to my hotel. We watched The Sound of Music and then headed out for Christmas dinner. I had Hawaiian pizza (ham and pineapple, as it seemed very Christmasy to eat these foods) and it was delicious. The restaurant was completely empty, except for us, but we had a wonderful meal.
Merry Christmas.
:)
By Miss F.
(before leaving for break, I assigned each student a writing journal, in which they were to write one page each day of break. in an effort to more effortlessly share my bali trip with you, I am going to share my journal (it's only fair that I had to write one too), in about a dozen short installments, to share part of my Baliday with you. it's a quick read, if you're interested, and contains just a few pictures. please note that internet links are a bonus for you, and will not be available for my second grade students.)
----------------
December 16, 2007
Ouch!
Today was a painful day!
Miss Pruce and I went together to get our eyebrows waxed, and it was not very nice. First, they put hot wax on your eyebrows, then a strip of cotton over it. Lastly, they yank the cotton off, peeling all the hairs with it - ouch! In the end, though, my eyebrows looked great.
Late in the evening, I realized that my flight left at 9:00 am on Monday, not 9:00 pm, like I had thought. Oops! I had to pack really, really quickly, and scramble to find a ride to the airport in the morning. Luckily, Mr. Webb was able to take me bright and early. I hope I make it!
----------------
December 17
On My Way
I made it on time!
Sometimes traveling alone is really boring. Luckily, I had lots of tv and movies on my Ipod. While it was charging at the Korean airport, though, I took a break and studied my Japanese. While I was doing it, I ate a whole bag of Korean pumpkin candies. Yum!
Also today I have four different currencies (kinds of money) in my wallet - dollars (American), won (Korean), rupee (Indonesian), and yen (Japanese). I didn't really need the won, I just bought it for fun! :) My wallet is now very colorful inside!
p.s. I was so excited this evening - on my long flight between Seoul and Bali, the airline ran out of room in the plane, so I got to sit in first class! You should have seen me giggling at my luck! My seat was huge and reclined almost to a bed. But the best part was that I got to watch heaps of movie from my own personal screen, and I chose High School Musical 2, which I have been dying to see! Yay!
----------------
December 18
Contiki Bali
I really like my first resort. There are 5 pools and a spa. On day 1, I got a pedicure (for my feet) and a facial (for my face). In fact, today I booked massages for every day of my stay. How exciting!
I have already met a lot of really nice people and it has been a lot of fun. Tonight for dinner there will be fajitas, a Mexican dish that is one of my favorites. Right now, though, I am headed out shopping - I love spending money!
Contiki Bali Resort
----------------
December 19
Surf's Up!
Day one of surf school today - how cool!
When I took a holiday in Australia, I tried surfing but did not like it. So, I thought I would try it again here. It was much easier, and my instructor was great. On my first try I was up on the board surfing, and by the end of the day, I looked like a pro! I've got two more days of lessons, so I am going to get really good, hopefully. Now, if I can only get over the board rash on my legs...
----------------
December 20
Charlie and Helen
I tried surf school again today, but had to stop because my knees were so sore and bruised. I will finish my surf lessons next week. One of the boys I was surfing with, Charlie, was American. I was very surprised, though, to find out that he and his family live in Japan! I gave him my e-mail address and hopefully we'll stay in touch!
Tonight, while I was eating dinner with friends, I noticed a girl sitting alone, so I invited her to sit with us. Her name was Helen, and although she is British, she lives in Japan too! Can you believe it? It's such a small world...
----------------
December 21
Petra the Pachyderm
Today was supposed to be my last day of surfing school, but instead, I pushed back my lessons to next week so I'd have time to recover and feel better. I decided instead to go on safari today with some friends. We got in a van and drove a long way up to a volcano. When we got there, we got on bikes and rode all the way back down, through villages, seeing native peoples. My favorite part was laughing and playing with a group of local kiddos in a small village. They were so cute and had so little (very few toys - no tv...), but they were so happy. It was a wonderful experience.
On the last part of our trip, we rode our bikes into an elephant safari park. We had a great lunch and then got to ride the elephants. I've never been on an elephant before - it was a really neat feeling. In the picture is Helen and myself on Petra, our elephant.
----------------
December 22
Getting better all the time!
My Baliday is really getting good!
Today I left Contiki to move into another, more quiet part of Bali. My room at my new hotel is really beautiful, like being in a palace (pictured). I ordered food, which was brought directly to my room - I didn't even have to get up!
Unfortunately, this hotel only had one night for me, the other two nights that I needed were full - so I was a bit worried. But, things always seem to work out, and they are building a new, fancier hotel next door, which they are giving me a room in to stay for my last two nights. This hotel next door is even nicer than the one I am in - if you can imagine that! They are very expensive, but, since they are under construction, they are letting me stay there very cheap, at about half of the price of what a night will cost when the hotel is finished...
Honeymoon Guesthouse, Bali
----------------
December 23
Nature
Have you actually ever been woken by a rooster's cock-a-doodle-doo? I can now say that I have, but not by 1, but by 5, crowing for an hour, begging me to get up. Good morning! Good morning!
I visited with Mr. and Mrs. Genest today - they are staying in the same town as me! I met them at their hotel, and we went to see the monkeys at the Monkey Palace. There were so many monkeys, and wild too! Once, when I bent down to take a picture of one monkey, another jumped on my back! They were selling bananas to feed to them, but I didn't buy any because they were making the monkeys CRAZY!
----------------
December 24
Retail Therapy
Today I am on my own for the first day since I've come. I was in a good mood this morning because I slept so well in my new place - the sheets were like silk! Amazing animal noises kept waking me up all night, but I didn't mind. It's neat to sleep in the middle of the open. I am just glad my bed has a netting around it to keep the bugs OUT!
When I went shopping today, the clouds opened up and it rained for 5 hours! So, I bought a magazine and sat down at a little cafe. I ordered a chocolate-avocado juice because I thought it would be interesting to try. I didn't really like it, but now ta least I know not to want to try it again!
----------------
December 25
Christmas Dinner (x2)
Today I said goodbye to my great room (the picture, right, is the upstairs and downstairs, the entire unit which was mine during this stay), but not before taking my hand at Balinese cooking. I figured spending Christmas lunch learning how to cook great Bali foods would be really fun, and I was not disappointed.
After lunch, a cab picked me up and took me all the way back to my third and final hotel in Kuta, about an hour from where I had been. After relaxing for about an hour, Mr. and Mrs. Genest came to my hotel. We watched The Sound of Music and then headed out for Christmas dinner. I had Hawaiian pizza (ham and pineapple, as it seemed very Christmasy to eat these foods) and it was delicious. The restaurant was completely empty, except for us, but we had a wonderful meal.
Merry Christmas.
:)
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Secandchans
Recently, at my gym, there was a contest. Each time you went, you received a stamp on a card. After three stamps, you redeemed the card for a can of sport drink.
The first time I turned my filled card in, I received my sports drink and a note. It said:
There is a present when three points are collected.
Moreover, the BIG present is a hit in Secandchans.
Let's Try!
What they (probably) meant was:
Here is your present!
We are also entering your name into a second chance drawing!
Good luck!
So, I am deciding to give you all a secandchans...
My last game, name those cities, was mildly popular. Mildly.
For those of you who made an attempt (that'd be Aunt Jenni and Anonymous), you were both right or close on 6 of the 7, with Aunt Jenni edging out the (anonymous) competitor 6 correct guesses to 5:
Rosanzerusu (Los Angeles)
Nyu yoku (New York)
Rondon (London)
Ajia (Asia)
Yoroppa (Europe)
Osutoraria (Australia)
Neither of you got Burajiru, or Brazil. (duh...)
Now, as I sift again through my Japanese lessons, I am finding more everyday, familiar words that seem plainly out-of-the ordinary when translated into Japanese. So, if you think you're keen and sharp, give the secandchans a go:
Let's try!!
people:
1. enjinia
places:
2. robii (informal place)
3. Itaria
things:
4. purezento
5. kado
6. enpitsu
7. terebi
8. chokoreto
9. kohii
10. takushii
11. biiru
12. Kurisumasu
13. sandoitchi
14. aisukuriimu
Good luck.
(and depending on the replies, there might be a thurdchans?)
The first time I turned my filled card in, I received my sports drink and a note. It said:
There is a present when three points are collected.
Moreover, the BIG present is a hit in Secandchans.
Let's Try!
What they (probably) meant was:
Here is your present!
We are also entering your name into a second chance drawing!
Good luck!
So, I am deciding to give you all a secandchans...
My last game, name those cities, was mildly popular. Mildly.
For those of you who made an attempt (that'd be Aunt Jenni and Anonymous), you were both right or close on 6 of the 7, with Aunt Jenni edging out the (anonymous) competitor 6 correct guesses to 5:
Rosanzerusu (Los Angeles)
Nyu yoku (New York)
Rondon (London)
Ajia (Asia)
Yoroppa (Europe)
Osutoraria (Australia)
Neither of you got Burajiru, or Brazil. (duh...)
Now, as I sift again through my Japanese lessons, I am finding more everyday, familiar words that seem plainly out-of-the ordinary when translated into Japanese. So, if you think you're keen and sharp, give the secandchans a go:
Let's try!!
people:
1. enjinia
places:
2. robii (informal place)
3. Itaria
things:
4. purezento
5. kado
6. enpitsu
7. terebi
8. chokoreto
9. kohii
10. takushii
11. biiru
12. Kurisumasu
13. sandoitchi
14. aisukuriimu
Good luck.
(and depending on the replies, there might be a thurdchans?)
Friday, November 09, 2007
Dear Mom and Gary,
I know it is going to be a year before you come to visit me in Japan, but there are a few things you'll need to know to help you get along. Since I've come, I've been collecting little tips for this exact reason, and I've decided to let you in on them a little early.
For starters, I will do my best to help you avoid Japanese toilets, but it is likely that before you leave, you will frequent a facility that does not care to take the more Western style into consideration. Please begin to practice for this now. The best tool to get you started? A spade and a 3x1x1 foot hole in the ground. Plus, I'll clue you in that it's much easier to use it if you face forward, not backwards. This is firsthand, tried-and-true knowledge on that that could save you some awkward embarrassment...
Raw fish isn't as bad as it looks. And it's much better than pretending what you are eating at Outback is anything close to what you'd expect to eat at Outback.
Mom: You are just going to love driving in Japan! Everything; the road, the steering wheel, all on the left side of the road. Just perfect for you southpaws! Imagine, for the first time in your life, reaching for the radio with your left hand. I bet it'll be a dream come true!
Garyls: The mailmen here are so friendly and courteous. Just like you! I'll see if I can't introduce you to a few...
There's no Dr. Pepper, or even diet cola. You'll have to do without. But there are lots of nice drinks you'll love. One, called Pocari Sweat, tastes just like it sounds. And green tea really is green and sometimes looks like powdered green chalk. I'm sure once you've tried it and gotten used to the pungent aroma, you'll really, really like it.
I hope you guys like soy sauce!
If you're really nice, I'll translate for you. Or, I just might sit back, watch you fend for yourselves, and laugh silently. (I guess it really depends on how many boxes of Cheerios you bring?).
Fortunately, at 165 centimeters, I don't stand out a whole lot. The bow-legged Japanese girls in heels keep up with me. But you two, measuring in at roughly 172 and 178 cm, well, you're screwed. The good news for me - when you get here, the little children at the shops will stop staring at ME so much...
Oh! I'm already so excited to see you both and welcome you to my part of the world! We'll have such a good time!
Love,
Wendy
For starters, I will do my best to help you avoid Japanese toilets, but it is likely that before you leave, you will frequent a facility that does not care to take the more Western style into consideration. Please begin to practice for this now. The best tool to get you started? A spade and a 3x1x1 foot hole in the ground. Plus, I'll clue you in that it's much easier to use it if you face forward, not backwards. This is firsthand, tried-and-true knowledge on that that could save you some awkward embarrassment...
Raw fish isn't as bad as it looks. And it's much better than pretending what you are eating at Outback is anything close to what you'd expect to eat at Outback.
Mom: You are just going to love driving in Japan! Everything; the road, the steering wheel, all on the left side of the road. Just perfect for you southpaws! Imagine, for the first time in your life, reaching for the radio with your left hand. I bet it'll be a dream come true!
Garyls: The mailmen here are so friendly and courteous. Just like you! I'll see if I can't introduce you to a few...
There's no Dr. Pepper, or even diet cola. You'll have to do without. But there are lots of nice drinks you'll love. One, called Pocari Sweat, tastes just like it sounds. And green tea really is green and sometimes looks like powdered green chalk. I'm sure once you've tried it and gotten used to the pungent aroma, you'll really, really like it.
I hope you guys like soy sauce!
If you're really nice, I'll translate for you. Or, I just might sit back, watch you fend for yourselves, and laugh silently. (I guess it really depends on how many boxes of Cheerios you bring?).
Fortunately, at 165 centimeters, I don't stand out a whole lot. The bow-legged Japanese girls in heels keep up with me. But you two, measuring in at roughly 172 and 178 cm, well, you're screwed. The good news for me - when you get here, the little children at the shops will stop staring at ME so much...
Oh! I'm already so excited to see you both and welcome you to my part of the world! We'll have such a good time!
Love,
Wendy
Saturday, November 03, 2007
A letter to my uncle
Dear Uncle Brad,
I think that eating hot dogs and enjoying them while getting pictures taken must run in the family.
I want to tell you, though, that when it comes to captured moments, you were much, much more graceful than me when YOU were photographed eating a hot dog.
That aside, though, I was much hungrier for this hot dog than you were. Much hungrier. So much hungrier for a hot dog, in fact, that on that day (which was today), I decided that that hot dog (and the accompanying Dr. Pepper) was the best food I had had in three months.
Let it also be known that Shizuko, my student photographer, was lucky to capture this shot only an instant before the whole thing went in my mouth and into my waiting belly without a single chew.
Aunt Barb would've been so proud, and not a bit shocked, to see truly how fast I ate that thing.
God I hate sushi.
Love,
your niece Wendy
Mmmmm....
My new love is Indian food.
Indian food. My new love is Indian food.
I can't get enough.
Sag curry, made of spinach, with cheese nan.
When we eat out at Indian, my meal costs as much as each couple, as I've made it a habit of buying two portions, one for lunch the next day. One weekend day I had Indian for breakfast and lunch (would've done dinner as well if I hadn't eaten it all during the first two meals).
When I told people that I've never eaten Indian food before, they were shocked. Then I told them I was from Iowa, and they understood.
Yum.
Indian food. My new love is Indian food.
I can't get enough.
Sag curry, made of spinach, with cheese nan.
When we eat out at Indian, my meal costs as much as each couple, as I've made it a habit of buying two portions, one for lunch the next day. One weekend day I had Indian for breakfast and lunch (would've done dinner as well if I hadn't eaten it all during the first two meals).
When I told people that I've never eaten Indian food before, they were shocked. Then I told them I was from Iowa, and they understood.
Yum.
Thursday, November 01, 2007
The ability to go...
I am mobile!
Blessed, blessed mobility!
Last month, I purchased a car on the same day that internet became available at my house. In one day I was twice as mobile as I was the day before. Then, a couple of weeks later, in my apartment, I finally got a cordless phone, which allows me to walk further than 1.5 feet away from the fridge when I'm talking to friends and family (very handy)!
The internet is great. It is fast, and lets me keep in touch earlier. I'll still pretend that I am too busy to write e-mails (wait, who's pretending?), but am more likely to get back to you sooner now. No excuses...
My car is a sweet little thing. It's a Honda Logo, a car which can't be bought in the States. It's small but mighty, and has a turbo engine. It has a lot of great little features, including CD sound, electric windows, heaps of space, and good gas mileage. A few weekends ago I went rafting, and my car was the one of choice, as it does well on petrol. I fit three large adults, plus myself, inside, with room to spare. And it goes super speedy. Pretty good for the tiny little thing that it is.
Helpful tip (and random tangent...) for driving on the left side of the road (disclaimer - only will work for me - don't try this at home): I just remember to drive on the side of the road that is the same as the wrist I have tattooed. Or, just follow the person in front of you and hope they're going to the same place you are...
Friday, October 26, 2007
Recipe for (hilarious) disaster...
(This is reminiscent of being in Auckland again, only instead of crass-mouthed men, it's an innocent-mouthed small child...)
The lesson: tuning in on interesting words
The ongoing lesson consists of teaching kiddos to listen for interesting words. I have made this lesson travel over to our daily read-aloud, The Trumpet of the Swan, in which children are supposed to listen for and share interesting words they hear. Since the book is a bit older, there are quite a few words of older fashion that the students do not know and find interesting. One word that one of my kiddos found interesting was gay. She infered (correctly) that it meant happy. So, we added it to our growing list of interesting words, and get excited when we hear it in our daily reading of this book, where the main character, Louis, is an exceptionally happy swan.
The assignment: writing sentences with your spelling words
Each night students are required to do various spelling assignments with their weekly words. Tuesday night's assignment is to write each word in a sentence, making sure to write the spelling word in colored pencil.
The recipe:
Mix together 1 part lesson and 1 part spelling assignment
(I feel gay.)
Luckily this student's parents do not speak a lick of English...
The lesson: tuning in on interesting words
The ongoing lesson consists of teaching kiddos to listen for interesting words. I have made this lesson travel over to our daily read-aloud, The Trumpet of the Swan, in which children are supposed to listen for and share interesting words they hear. Since the book is a bit older, there are quite a few words of older fashion that the students do not know and find interesting. One word that one of my kiddos found interesting was gay. She infered (correctly) that it meant happy. So, we added it to our growing list of interesting words, and get excited when we hear it in our daily reading of this book, where the main character, Louis, is an exceptionally happy swan.
The assignment: writing sentences with your spelling words
Each night students are required to do various spelling assignments with their weekly words. Tuesday night's assignment is to write each word in a sentence, making sure to write the spelling word in colored pencil.
The recipe:
Mix together 1 part lesson and 1 part spelling assignment
(I feel gay.)
Luckily this student's parents do not speak a lick of English...
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Name That City!
The Japanese, who like to make nothing easy, keep their society complicated partially due to 4 alphabets. Two of them, hiragana and katakana, are small symbols that make up the Japanese sounds in every word (in each of these two alphabets there are 47 symbols for each sound such as ga, wa, se, mi, etc...). The third alphabet is for words, and is called kanji. You may recognize it as pictographs, like Chinese writing. The fourth alphabet is the roman alphabet, called romanji, and is used in various forms such as writing bad grammar on t-shirts or spelling out words for stupid gaijin (foreigners like me).
Of the four alphabets, katakana is the most useful to know, as this is the alphabet that is used to spell out foriegn words that are not native to Japan. These words include such gems as clinic (ku-ri-n-ku), or America (a-me-ri-ka). As I have hinted in previous blogs, the Japanese have no sounds for some letters of our alphabet, such as l, th, or most blends.
I am telling you this because every day I come across a word that has been loosely translated from a foriegn word to fit the letter sounds that the Japanese have. This is a constant source of amusement for me, and tonight, I found the ultimate set of words, using Japanese sounds, to share with you.
So... please... see if YOU can name these cities, continents, and countries in the world (hint: it helps to sound each one out slowly):
1. Rosanzerusu
2. Nyu yoku
3. Rondon
4. Ajia
5. Yoroppa
6. Osutoraria
7. Burajiru
(post your answers in the comments spot - prize for the most guessed correctly - and no peeking at others' answers!)
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Normal, not normal
Normal: driving on the right side of the road
Not Normal: driving on the left side of the road
Normal: one syllable for the word 'I'
Not Normal: 4 syllables for the word 'I' (wa-ta-shi-wa)
Normal: peeing sitting down
Not Normal: peeing while squatting
Normal: having 14 students in your class
Not Normal: having more than 20 (ooh... a little reversal on you there!)
Normal: the art of civilized conversation
Not Normal: reverting to hand signals and gestures when you want something
Not Normal: driving on the left side of the road
Normal: one syllable for the word 'I'
Not Normal: 4 syllables for the word 'I' (wa-ta-shi-wa)
Normal: peeing sitting down
Not Normal: peeing while squatting
Normal: having 14 students in your class
Not Normal: having more than 20 (ooh... a little reversal on you there!)
Normal: the art of civilized conversation
Not Normal: reverting to hand signals and gestures when you want something
Disclaimer
Today, I spent USD$105 sending home packages to cover the three birthdays and two babies that have happened in the last two months.
I can do this no more.
Please, out of respect for my budget, do not be upset when I do not send packages to you. Instead, be assured that I will bring gifts to cover all babies, weddings, and birthdays when I come in March.
I promise.
:)
I can do this no more.
Please, out of respect for my budget, do not be upset when I do not send packages to you. Instead, be assured that I will bring gifts to cover all babies, weddings, and birthdays when I come in March.
I promise.
:)
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Before and after
Since coming to Japan, I've had to learn to speak two languages: Japanese and bad English.
Recently, I received an e-mail from a very nice Japanese lady whom I had spoken with during my Japanese classes. I had offered to work at a Japanese fair, speaking English to Japanese students, and she had written to say thank you.
In the past, my e-mail reply would have been verbose and wordy, (hopefully) intelligent, and with humor. It might have sounded something like this:
Hey Yoshiko!
Thanks for the great e-mail - I enjoyed hearing from you!
I am super excited and more than happy to do the fair next month. Having a chat with Japanese students should be right up my alley! It will be a blast, I'm sure!
By the way, I am looking to possibly get into teaching English to Japanese adults. Would you have any information on where I can look to get in on the likes of this kind of position? I'd really love to put my teaching to the test with older students, and help my Japanese at the same time! A double-whammy!
Thanks again for your e-mail. I'll look forward to hearing from you soon!
:)wendy
-----
Now, though, considering my audience, I've had to scale back the grandeur of even the most simple e-mails. Letters I write to parents and Japanese adults typically sound as follows:
Nanbu-san!
Hello again!
Thank you for your nice e-mail. I am very glad and excited to do the
Japanese fair! It will be a fun and learning event for me too!
I am good in Japan. I am here alone, and sometimes that can be a bit
hard, but the people I work with at the school are very friendly. I
like them. Nagoya is a nice place. It is hot as where I come from,
so there is not a big change for me.
It would be good to meet the family you have. The son and daughter sound nice. We can do conversation together to practice if you would like that!
Do you do teaching sometimes at the Nihongo classes too? I would like
to get more information about teaching English to adults in the
evenings. How do I find out about this teaching?
It is great to talk to you!
Wendy
-------
For further note, consider the following e-mail I received from a parent in the other second grade class. He works for Korean Air and will hopefully be helping me find discount airfare for my trip over the winter holidays:
hellow? miss foreman......
it is my pleasure to come to greet to you......
please do not hesitate to contact me.....
i will here for you in nagoya branch as a manager....
anyway, please info me about your holiday schedule bound for bali.......
then i will give a itinerary and air-price...
so, lets keep in touch!!!!!!!!
bye now........take care!!!!!!
Sincerely yours
Sanghoon (jinhee father)
phone number : 090....
Recently, I received an e-mail from a very nice Japanese lady whom I had spoken with during my Japanese classes. I had offered to work at a Japanese fair, speaking English to Japanese students, and she had written to say thank you.
In the past, my e-mail reply would have been verbose and wordy, (hopefully) intelligent, and with humor. It might have sounded something like this:
Hey Yoshiko!
Thanks for the great e-mail - I enjoyed hearing from you!
I am super excited and more than happy to do the fair next month. Having a chat with Japanese students should be right up my alley! It will be a blast, I'm sure!
By the way, I am looking to possibly get into teaching English to Japanese adults. Would you have any information on where I can look to get in on the likes of this kind of position? I'd really love to put my teaching to the test with older students, and help my Japanese at the same time! A double-whammy!
Thanks again for your e-mail. I'll look forward to hearing from you soon!
:)wendy
-----
Now, though, considering my audience, I've had to scale back the grandeur of even the most simple e-mails. Letters I write to parents and Japanese adults typically sound as follows:
Nanbu-san!
Hello again!
Thank you for your nice e-mail. I am very glad and excited to do the
Japanese fair! It will be a fun and learning event for me too!
I am good in Japan. I am here alone, and sometimes that can be a bit
hard, but the people I work with at the school are very friendly. I
like them. Nagoya is a nice place. It is hot as where I come from,
so there is not a big change for me.
It would be good to meet the family you have. The son and daughter sound nice. We can do conversation together to practice if you would like that!
Do you do teaching sometimes at the Nihongo classes too? I would like
to get more information about teaching English to adults in the
evenings. How do I find out about this teaching?
It is great to talk to you!
Wendy
-------
For further note, consider the following e-mail I received from a parent in the other second grade class. He works for Korean Air and will hopefully be helping me find discount airfare for my trip over the winter holidays:
hellow? miss foreman......
it is my pleasure to come to greet to you......
please do not hesitate to contact me.....
i will here for you in nagoya branch as a manager....
anyway, please info me about your holiday schedule bound for bali.......
then i will give a itinerary and air-price...
so, lets keep in touch!!!!!!!!
bye now........take care!!!!!!
Sincerely yours
Sanghoon (jinhee father)
phone number : 090....
Monday, October 01, 2007
You Laise Me Up
Now, don't get me wrong. I am very, very tolerant of others. I am very accepting of people for who they are. No matter what they say or do as part of their culture.
But I'm not going to lie. Sometimes a big, big laugh just comes out. Often in the most inappropriate times. Like this one...
Last week, there was an amazing youth orchestra who came to our school to do a concert. It was BEAUTIFUL! The string players were from 10-20 years old and were brilliant.
There was also a singer who did an opera number that was breathtaking.
But then...
She started to sing "You Raise Me Up" accompanied by the strings. It was fantastic, until the first line of the chorus came and she started singing "You laise me up, so I can cwimb on mountains...."
When the song was over, my tongue was bleeding from biting it really hard.
It's tough being a role model for children...
But I'm not going to lie. Sometimes a big, big laugh just comes out. Often in the most inappropriate times. Like this one...
Last week, there was an amazing youth orchestra who came to our school to do a concert. It was BEAUTIFUL! The string players were from 10-20 years old and were brilliant.
There was also a singer who did an opera number that was breathtaking.
But then...
She started to sing "You Raise Me Up" accompanied by the strings. It was fantastic, until the first line of the chorus came and she started singing "You laise me up, so I can cwimb on mountains...."
When the song was over, my tongue was bleeding from biting it really hard.
It's tough being a role model for children...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
